


Reincarnation

by Aria6



Series: A Coyote's Stories [59]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Arranged Marriage, Multi, Nobility, Rebirth
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-11
Updated: 2015-07-10
Packaged: 2018-03-17 10:55:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 22,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3526637
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Aria6/pseuds/Aria6
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Author's Note: Just a crazy idea I came up with… ^_^</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: Just a crazy idea I came up with… ^_^

_I don't want to be here._ She took a slow, calming breath, schooling herself to patience. As she did, her hands tightened minutely around the bouquet of flowers she was holding. _Patience._ It was something she was good at, along with creating an aura of calm about her. So she'd been told, at least, and now would be a very bad time for her few gifts to desert her.

She was among the most beautiful young women of her generation. So she had been told, many times, and the male attention she received seemed to agree with the assessment. The young men had flocked to her, when she'd made her debute at the yearly ball. Had that only been two years ago? It seemed like a lifetime ago. And that had been when she had met her soon to be husband.

He had seemed sad to her, then. It had been odd… his manner had been so open and cheerful but she had been able to see that he had not wanted to dance with her, not wanted to take her hand. He had done it anyway – why? She was not sure – and they had danced a single set before she had allowed him to escape. As they danced, he had intrigued her. It was such a small interaction to read so many things into, but she'd always been good at seeing what lay beneath. Who was this stranger and why was he so unhappy to be there? He'd failed to introduce himself, likely assuming she knew, and she had failed to ask.

Later, of course, she found out that he was Kyoraku Shunsui. A powerful shinigami, heir to the Kyoraku clan and currently unmarried. All in all, a highly desirable bachelor. When she mentioned how reluctant he seemed to her aunt, she was told that he was a ladies man and wished to remain single. However, that somehow did not ring true for her. That sadness… it did not seem right.

She had made the mistake of mentioning that to her aunt, and the old woman had taken it as an expression of interest. In a way, what had followed was no surprise. As a young noblewoman with high reiatsu, she had two choices in life… marry or become a shinigami. And while she was not certain about marriage she was absolutely sure she did NOT want to be a shinigami. She had no idea why, but just the thought sent a chill up her spine. So she would marry.

Still, she hadn't expected it to happen so soon, or with a man she'd only met once. Plenty of suitors came to the clan house looking for her in particular. She'd spent many pleasant afternoons with them and developed some true interests. Why a man who hadn't given even the slightest hint of attraction? She'd tried to protest to her aunt, but the old woman would not hear of it. After all, as a young woman of the Kuchiki clan, it was her obligation to marry. (She'd wanted to ask, if that was the case, why her aunt still wore a furisode. But she hadn't quite dared.) And Kyoraku Shunsui was a stupendous catch, particularly given that she was a cousin, not part of the main clan. She had regarded that dubiously… true, she might be only a cousin but for some reason the Kuchiki line seemed to be failing. Byakuya had fallen deeply in love and refused to remarry and she was actually one of the few cousins left with any strength. The only one more eligible in the clan was Kuchiki Rukia, but she was adopted. Not something anyone in the clan would ever forget. So she was quite desirable for a marriage match.

Her aunt had met that by pointing out that she was quite right and they had arranged the highest possible marriage for her. It had all left her a little speechless. The fact that her child might be the heir to two great clans left her underwhelmed. She just wanted to – to be _wanted_. Was that too much to ask?

Apparently, it was. They had been kept strictly separate except for formal meetings and she'd quickly discovered that it was because in the past, Shunsui had so offended prospective brides that they had broken things off. Wonderful. He must be thrilled to be marrying her…

So now she stood at the shrine, waiting for the man she would soon be tied to forever to arrive. _Patience. He will be here soon._

All too soon.

* * *

"I'm so sorry Juu." Shunsui sounded absolutely miserable. Juushiro shook his head with a small smile before giving his best friend and lover a gentle hug.

"It's fine. We always knew it might happen." 'It' being a marriage, forced onto him by his family. "At least everyone says she's very sweet." He said, trying to put the best face on it he could. He'd never really met the girl Shunsui was marrying. All he knew about her was that she had very high reiatsu, strong enough that it sparkled around her like a cloud. She was also part of the Kuchiki clan and if Byakuya remained unmarried, her children might well inherit the clan.

All of that only made it harder for Shunsui, though. He'd been unable to find even the slightest excuse to refuse the match. His prospective bride was strong, intelligent, good natured and beautiful beyond words. Juushiro had seen her at the yearly ball and did remember how she'd glowed, in her gown of white and gold. She had seemed so happy to be there. Would she be happy today, he wondered?

When he set eyes on her again, he really wasn't sure. She was standing by the priest, wearing a fine wedding kimono of white and peach. A white hood hid her hair and her makeup and presentation were impeccable. Her expression was one of calm as she gazed away, waiting for her new husband to arrive. Her face was as he remembered, very beautiful. It was something about her bone structure… her face was strong yet elegant and very, very individual. Many pretty women were easily forgettable, but not Kuchiki Mai.

_I hope they will be happy._ It hurt, giving up Shunsui a bit. Not entirely but now they would no longer share a home. Their meetings would be clandestine and more dangerous, in the future. And Shunsui would be obliged to please his bride. Juushiro knew he could and earnestly hoped he would come to enjoy it, take pleasure in the young woman. He wanted them both to be happy.

He saw the woman's head turn, her soft grey eyes settling on them. She smiled then, and it seemed sweet yet mysterious, full of secret thoughts. Juushiro felt Shunsui stiffen beside him and gently nudged him. His best friend took a deep breath before walking up to the officiant. Juushiro took his place, watching patiently.

The wedding of two extremely high nobles was not a quick thing. When they had to speak, Kuchiki's voice was firm and carrying. Shunsui, on the other hand, was barely audible. Eventually, they exchanged rings. That was not a traditional Japanese usage, but it had been taken up by Soul Society long ago. It was especially useful for high families… the ring Mai slid on her hand held the crest of the Kyoraku clan, a sign that she was joining her new family.

When the ceremony was over they shared a decorous kiss as petals were showered around. Only Juushiro and, perhaps, Kuchiki Mai caught the stiffness, the slightly forced edge to Shunsui's smile. Then he took her hand and escorted his new bride to the celebrations. Juushiro trailed behind, deeply worried for his friend and lover.

He could only imagine what Shunsui was thinking right now.

* * *

_What is he thinking?_ Mai glanced at the profile of her new husband, trying to find what lay behind that slight stiffness. His jaw seemed tight. He seemed angry to her, beneath his smile. With her? Or with the whole situation? _I didn't want this either. Really, I didn't._

The banquet was sumptuous and both their families were there. Mai accepted Byakuya's respects and well wishes with a graceful nod and smile while Shunsui responded almost cheerfully. Perhaps she was the only one who caught the underpinning of resignation in his voice. Why had she been cursed with such sensitivity? It seemed useless at a time like this.

The food was delicious and she tasted almost none of it. Her nervousness and near fear were getting the better of her. Tonight, she would no longer be a virgin. That was a terrifying thought, particularly with a man she did not really want. Although Shunsui was quite attractive and everyone said he was a ladies' man. Surely it would not be too bad…?

After the festivities were over, he showed her to his house. It was her first time seeing it and she was mildly surprised by the size of it. It was only a tiny thing, but deep in the Seireitei. That would make it easy to clean, at least. Although, did he have servants? Mai honestly hoped he didn't. She enjoyed cooking as a hobby and cleaning would give her something to do.

"Shunsui…" As she said his name he turned towards her and she could see the tension, the anger lurking behind his mask. The veil over it was thinning, now. "I'm sorry, I didn't want this either." She said softly, hoping he would believe her. "They just wouldn't listen…" Mai still didn't entirely understand why. Shunsui stared at her for a moment before heaving a small sigh and she could see some of the tension leaving him.

"No, they wouldn't." He said softly before smiling. It was a small, unhappy smile. "I imagine my clan gave the Kuchiki's quite a bit for you." He said lightly and Mai blinked at the thought. Normally, bride gifts ran the other way. Could that really be true? "Would you like some tea?"

"Please." She accepted. That would help calm her nerves a touch. He gently helped her out of a bit of her wedding finery – it was terribly heavy – and gratefully took a seat at the table as he made the tea. She mentally mapped out where the tea supplies were… she would have to learn the location of everything. He brought the tea back and she sipped her slowly. "Do you have servants?" She asked and he paused in sipping his tea before giving her a small smile.

"No. Until our marriage, I shared this place with my best friend, Juushiro. He liked to cook. I do have a maid who comes in twice a month to help." He said and she felt quite relieved. Although…

"I'm sorry your friend had to move out." She honestly felt badly about that, although another man living with a newly married couple would be odd, to say the least. And the house would be quite small for that. "I love to cook though." Mai was very happy that she could do that. It would have been difficult if he'd had a personal chef or worse, a staff. They would naturally want the lady of the house out of the kitchen. "Is there anything you particularly like?"

"Only pork buns." He said with a small smile and she nodded earnestly. She'd never tried to make those from scratch. Perhaps it would be more practical to buy them. "You are taking this so seriously."

"I want to be a good wife to you." She said softly, meaning it with all her heart. This was her duty, her place in life, and she aimed to do it well. He stared at her and the look on his face was… strange. Taken aback? "Shunsui?" Why would that surprise him? She had been training for this all her life. He blinked before smiling at her. It seemed a bit false, though, to her eyes.

"It's nothing. Have you ever considered becoming a shinigami?" He asked and Mai couldn't help but freeze, a flash of irrational fear running through her mind. She shuddered faintly before shaking her head.

"I don't want that. It frightens me." She said honestly and his smile warmed, becoming a bit more genuine.

"Hollows can be quite terrifying." He said and she nodded, although… that was not what she was afraid of, not really. "That is not it?" That surprised her. He had read that in her expression? She'd thought she had a better 'Kuchiki mask' than that! Although, he was her husband. She was not supposed to keep her guard up around him.

"Not exactly… I'm afraid… that if I take up the sword, I would have to hurt someone." Mai said reluctantly. Shunsui's interested expression invited her to continue. "Someone who doesn't deserve to be hurt." She dropped her eyes, feeling uncertain just saying this. But surely Shunsui knew all about such things. There were riots and various insurrections all the time. Often, the bandits and other enemies of the order had very good reasons for their animosity. Mai was a Kuchiki, so she was informed on some of that… there was a soft sigh from her new husband.

"I won't deny that such things do happen. But mostly, we protect Soul Society and the Living World from hollows." He said after a moment and she lifted her eyes, seeing weariness and a deep pain hidden behind his calm mask. Suddenly, she was sure he'd killed someone and very much regretted it. But then, he was so much older. Surely he'd seen many horrible things over the years. Moved, she reached over the table to grip his hand.

"I'm sure you've saved many people." She said softly and saw a touch of surprise in those slate grey eyes. Then they warmed and he chuckled, softly.

"Ah, it's like you can read my mind!" He marveled and she smiled, shyly. "Well. Are you ready to go to bed?"

"I – yes." She stammered a touch, feeling an odd fluttering in her belly. Desire? But he was very handsome. She looked at him shyly. "I've never…" She was not at all sure what to expect. Was it going to hurt? He was helping her up, then, and his arms went around her. She allowed herself to settle against him, feeling how strong his body was, beneath his wedding finery.

"Yes, I would expect that. You are so very young…" He sounded like that saddened him. She felt a warm hand on her cheek, tilting her face up. Then he kissed her and she felt a much stronger flutter in her belly. Her first real kiss…

Mai went with him to the bedroom and blushed as he began to gently disrobe her. It really wasn't that simple and she helped him with the intricate ties to her formal kimono. Then she helped him with his simpler clothing before gazing at him with frank curiosity. He was so strong and so… furry… but what really claimed her attention was what lay between his legs. It looked decidedly odd to her eyes

"Your first time seeing a naked man?" He asked teasingly and she blushed before meeting his eyes. He had an amused smile on his face and his grey eyes were warm.

"Yes. My father died when I was little." She said, remembering. It had just been a hunting accident, nothing heroic. "I was raised by my aunts." And the thought of them telling her anything about naked men was laughable. From his chuckle, he understood that.

"What a terrifying childhood! But we can talk about that some other time…" He said before kissing her again. As he did, he drew her towards the bed. Mai went with him, feeling almost eager. She wanted to finally know what this was like…

Soon she was on the bed and his hands were upon her, sliding over her pale skin. Then his mouth was on her breast and she gasped as he sucked on her nipple. Was that supposed to feel so…? Her hand tangled in his hair, sweeping the blue cord away. It spilled over her then, a wave of chestnut.

"Shunsui…" Mai had never heard herself sound like that. "Oh…!" He was so hard and strong, his body fitting so well against her soft curves. Mai shuddered as a finger dipped past her folds, touching her in a place no man had ever visited.

"Kami, you are beautiful." There was warm desire in his voice and she gasped as he went back to her breasts, still teasing her with one hand. She gripped his wrist, pulling on him as he fingered her nub. She knew how those parts worked, of course, but to have someone else doing it… she whimpered at the intensity of the feeling. How much she wanted him now! Then he was moving up and she felt the brush of something hard and hot against her belly. Looking down she swallowed at the size of him. That was supposed to go inside her? "This will hurt." He warned her and she nodded before looking back into his face and taking a deep breath.

"I know." She said, wrapping her arms around those strong shoulders as she spread her legs. "Please, do it. I'm ready." She was afraid but this was supposed to happen. He looked at her searchingly for a moment before nodding.

The pain as he passed through the gates no man had crossed was brief but intense. Mai was vaguely aware of her voice rising and his rumbling chuckle as he gently petted her hair. She gasped, burying her face against his neck as she waited for the pain to ebb. It did, fairly quickly, and he kissed her before beginning to move. Mai felt pressure and it was uncomfortable, but not unbearable… and fairly soon it began to feel good.

"Shunsui…" She breathed his name as the pleasure began to build. The way he was rubbing against her, the feeling of being filled… she was sure it was going to sting tomorrow but right now, it was nice.

"Mai…" He spoke her name in her ear and she shivered at his tone. "Ah, kami, you are so beautiful…" There was that strange pain in his voice again. What did that mean? Then he took her more vigorously and Mai gasped, distracted from that.

She had not been expecting to find her orgasm. The few books she'd found on the subject had indicated that was rare, the first time. But somehow, he teased her into it and eventually she cried out, her nails digging into his back as her whole body trembled and quivered. It felt so incredible good… his breath was hot in her ear and she felt his powerful thrusts just before his body tensed, filling her with hot fluid. It stung a bit but mostly it felt good…

"I am a woman." She boasted, feeling almost giddy. So that was sex. Shunsui chuckled in her ear, lingering inside her pleasantly. Then he slowly pulled away and Mai winced as she felt a bit of cum running down her thigh. Good sex was messy, it seemed.

"Oh, that you are." He murmured, pulling her into a slow, leisurely kiss. "Mmm… I never would have imagined you knew such words." Shunsui said with a chuckle, his grey eyes warm. Mai blinked. Words? "When I took you."

"When… oh." What had she said? Mai blushed as she realized it had been quite rude. Shunsui saw the embarrassment on her face and smiled, holding her close.

"It was adorable." He reassured her and she smiled, nestling against him. "Go to sleep, Mai."

"Mmm hmm." Mai sighed and closed her eyes, enjoying his warmth and life. It was so nice to be held…

She fell asleep without even realizing it.

* * *

_It hurts. It hurts so much. Help me…_

… _I am not alone. Never… alone…_

_Wait._

_I…_

_Am…_

_Alone?_

* * *

Mai woke up with a startled gasp, feeling the terror burning in her breast. Beside her, her new husband did not stir. Blinking, she looked around the room.

"That dream again." She muttered. She'd had that dream since her father's death. Her aunts attributed it to that. Mai was not so sure. It was all so vague though, she had no real idea. "Hm." There was no window in the bedroom. That was a little odd. Carefully leaving the bed, she went to the main room to check the time.

The clock said it was almost five in the morning and it was still dark outside. That was fine, though. She was used to getting up early. Although how early would Shunsui awaken? Frowning to herself, she went to check what food was available. She would need to make some rice, of course…

Fortunately, Shunsui gave her plenty of time. She made rice for them both, as well as a quick miso soup. Tamagoyaki, rolled omelet, with shredded daikon. Some fish from the fridge, fried with a bit of soy sauce. She took her time, expecting Shunsui to get up soon. He was a taichou, after all. She knew Byakuya went to his Division with the rising of the sun.

"Um…" An hour later, Mai was rethinking that. She'd eaten and now she was sipping tea, waiting for his husband to awaken. It would be unmannerly to wake him up… well, the food could be reheated. She even knew a small kido for that. Tapping her lower lip, she decided to make the best of it and went to the bookshelf, looking through the novels there. Selecting something that looked interesting, she settled herself in to read.

Eventually, she glanced out the window before checking the clocks. It was almost eight. Surely he needed to get to work! And why was he sleeping so long? He'd gone to bed when she had, hadn't he? But he'd been very stressed the previous day…

"Shunsui?" Mai ventured into the bedroom, finding him spread across the bed and takin up every inch. He seemed so peaceful she almost regretted disturbing him but… "Shunsui, wake up." She said as firmly as she could before touching his shoulder. There was only a sleepy mutter. "Shunsui?" It was a bit odd that he had his bedroom as an inner room without a window. It definitely facilitated this behavior. Mai blinked as she had the oddest urge to punch or kick him, but restrained the impulse. "Shunsui!" She pushed him harder and eyes finally blinked before peering at her sleepily.

"Juu? Oh, Mai." He said and she smiled encouragingly. "Mmm, what is it?" He yawned, seeming ready to drop off again.

"Breakfast is ready and it's getting rather late." She was really quite worried about that. As his wife, wasn't it her duty to get him out the door on time? He blinked at her before chuckling.

"Ah, Mai. Can't I sleep in after my wedding day?" He asked and she bit her lip, unwilling to say that by her reckoning, he already had. But she'd been trained from an early age to rise with the dawn. Perhaps he did things differently. "Ah, I suppose you're right. Mmm, what time is it?" He asked as he pulled himself out of bed. She watched him, fascinated by the sight. He really was quite handsome…

"Ah, eight in the morning." She said as she collected her wits. He glanced at her and his sly smile said he knew exactly what was on her mind. But his reply was quite mild.

"Is it? That's about right. Juu always woke me up about then." That was a relief. "I'm afraid I'll have to depend on you for that in the future. I've always been terrible with mornings." He said and she nodded earnestly. She could certainly – "Ah, you take it all so seriously!"

"Oh, you…!" He was teasing her! She scowled at him, but not as though she meant it. "Take a shower and come to breakfast." Mai said firmly. He laughed and left the room to wash up, as she went back to the kitchen to prepare some tea for him. Smiling to herself, Mai was starting to feel hopeful.

Perhaps being married to Kyoraku Shunsui would be a good thing, after all.


	2. Chapter 2

"She's entirely too good for me, Juu."

"I could have told you that." Juushiro said teasingly, concealing a bit of worry. His best friend and lover was looking quietly depressed. He was quite sure he knew why.

"I hate doing this to her." Shunsui said in a low tone and he winced. Yes, that was what he'd thought. "Mai's so sweet. She deserves so much better than to be married to me."

"Shunsui." He said firmly. "What she doesn't know, won't hurt her. We've hidden this for centuries, we can keep hiding it. Just make her happy." Fortunately, he knew his friend was more than capable of making a woman deliriously happy. They hadn't been completely exclusive, over the years. Shunsui heaved a sigh before smiling and pulling out his bento box.

"Take a look at this." He said before opening it. Many of the contents were fairly typical… sliced steak, a little salad of diced carrots and kohlrabi, a little container of dressing. What wasn't typical at all, though, were the eggs. Nestled in a nest of noodles, they had been peeled and sculpted, the whites pared away to reveal the yolk. That yolk had been decorated with little faces made out of seaweed and carrots, and bits of egg white had been left on top of the yolks. They looked just like merry little chicks, erupting from their eggs. Juushiro stared for a moment before choking at the sight. "She tries to do something new every day. She says she wants to brighten my day." Shunsui said lightly and Juushiro laughed before reaching for his own lunch box. "Hmm?" Shunsui blinked as Juushiro opened the bento box and showed him the contents with a smile. "Oh!" Shunsui stared to laugh as he beheld the entirely adorable, rice cake pandas. "Who did that?" He asked as Juushiro regarded the box with tolerant amusement.

"My sister. This cute food seems to a fad among the women. Maybe they think it encourages children to try things." Juushiro picked up a rice cake and considered it. "I think it just makes it harder to eat." It was so pretty. Did he really want to ruin so much hard work? Shunsui chuckled before picking up an egg.

"Well, they'll just go bad if we don't. So…" He bit into his egg, catching a few crumbs of yoke in his fingers. Juushiro smiled and took a bite of his rice cake. It really was very good, tart but also a little sweet. They ate in companionable silence, just enjoying being together.

They had been friends and lovers forever. Despite their circumstances, that was not going to change.

* * *

Mai smiled as she sorted through the piles of vegetables at the market.

This was her daily routine, now. She slept in a bit – there was no need to rise before dawn when her husband didn't – then woke well before Shunsui and prepared breakfast and a bento box before waking him. They ate together and she saw him off with a kiss and his bento box. Then she cleaned for a bit before going to the market to buy whatever vegetables and meat looked best.

"Perhaps a stir-fry?" She mused as she looked at the bean sprouts. They looked particularly fine. "Hmmm." Deciding that sounded good she took those and some snap peas. She had some staples at home, onions, mushrooms and carrots. Now she just needed some meat –

"Mai!" Blinking, she looked up from the piles of food. She didn't recognize that voice. "Kyoraku Mai?" Looking around she saw a woman with bright red hair? She was wearing the black robes of a shinigami. And with her was a young woman with brown hair in a white bun. She was really very pretty…

"Hello?" She asked, a touch bewildered. The woman with the red hair smiled at her, very pleased.

"I know it was you! I'm Matsumoto Rangiku." She introduced herself. "This is Hinamori Momo." She introduced her friend, who waved with a smile. "Would you like to come to tea?"

"I would like that." Mai said shyly. She really did want to make friends. She was already getting acquainted with some of the other noblewomen in her neighborhood, but they were mostly from minor families. They could be very class conscious and it was hard to get to know them. If Rangiku was offering… Mai blinked as her arm was seized.

"Oh wonderful! Right this way!" To her faint bewilderment, she was pulled through the market. Mai was taken up a flight of stairs, then down another flight, and soon was quite hopelessly lost. Where were they going? There were more shops here, places she'd never penetrated. Mostly dark little shops with rather specialized goods… but then she was pulled into a tea shop.

"Oooo." Mai was pleased with the tea shop. It was the kind that carried the very best teas, in the right containers to keep them fresh for as long as possible. A shop for those who truly loved tea. And in addition, they had little cakes and cookies, with recommendations of what tea would go best with them. "Wonderful!" She'd just been buying her tea at the market. It wasn't bad, but this would be superior. Rangiku dimpled at her as Momo spoke enthusiastically.

"Isn't it? I love this place. Would you like green tea?" She asked and Mai nodded. "Three silver pins, please." She said to the woman behind the counter and she nodded, starting to fix the teas. "Did you want something to eat? The silver wafers go well with silver pin."

"I would like that." Mai found it enchanting. Silver cookies and silver tea? Yes, please. "Thank you so much." She would never have found this place without them. She wasn't terribly adventurous. Maybe she should fix that… soon they all had their teacups and wafers, on elegant little pieces of china. They went to one of the little tables and Mai sipped, deeply enjoying the floral aroma of the tea. It was very good…

"So we're all very curious about you!" Rangiku was not one to beat around the bush, it seemed. "Nanao says Kyoraku taichou's eating better than he has in his life!" Mai blushed at that. But she gave quite a bit of care to the bento boxes. "What's it like, being married to him?" She asked with wide-eyed curiosity and Mai blinked.

"Um… it's very nice. It's not very exciting…" What kind of stories was Rangiku expecting? She really wasn't sure. The other woman wrinkled her nose at her while Momo looked a touch embarrassed.

"He has quite a reputation for being a bit, mm, perverted." She said and Mai blushed. "You haven't done anything _interesting?_ " Whatever did she mean? Mai responded after a moment, feeling honestly bewildered.

"I – I really don't know what you mean. I think it's very interesting but I'm sure it's nothing that would surprise you…" Rangiku seemed experienced to her. Not that she knew much about such things.

"Rangiku, she's very young. I bet he's holding back so he won't shock her." Momo said and Mai wondered if that could be true. Rangiku suddenly grinned.

"Well, in that case…! Do you own any lingerie?" She asked and Mai blushed before shaking her head. She understood what that was for, of course, but she had no idea what stores sold such things. "We should take you shopping!" Mai had a distinct feeling she was an excuse to do what Rangiku loved. However, she didn't mind. She no longer had an allowance from the Kuchiki clan, but the Kyoraku clan had given her a seal. Anything she bought went to their accounts.

"But perhaps not today. You need to get back to work or Hitsugaya taichou is going to yell at you again." Momo said as she finished her tea. "When is your next day off? We both know you can shop all day." Rangiku pressed a finger against her lower lip, thinking about it.

"Thursday…" They quickly set a date. Mai was thrilled. She liked these two women and perhaps she could find out more about Shunsui from Rangiku.

Despite being married to him, she didn't know him too well yet. That was something she wanted to change.

* * *

"You know, I don't really know much about you." Shunsui said over supper. Mai blinked, a bit surprised. Byakuya could have told him quite a bit about her. But perhaps they were not on those kind of terms. "Do you have any hobbies? Aside from cooking." He sounded gently teasing and Mai blushed. She put a great deal of effort into their meals, particularly her baking. She didn't do it every day but perhaps twice a week she made them delicate desserts, tarts and molten cakes.

"Well, I… I like to write." She confessed after a moment. "I'm not very good." She said hastily as he looked intrigued. Shunsui smiled at her.

"Ah, we can be terrible together then! Everyone tells me I'm awful." He said cheerfully and Mai smiled back. She knew what he was talking about. She'd read the Seireitei Communications for years. "Anything else?"

"Just swimming." She missed having a pool. She'd been very good, good enough that her instructor had told her she could be competitive. Of course, that had not been part of her future.

"Really? We have a pool at my Division. You should come by sometime." He said and Mai liked that idea. Perhaps – "We could go swimming together."

"How do you do that?" How did he read her mind so well? Shunsui chuckled softly before eating more of his food. She'd made them both salmon sashimi tonight, very classically done.

"Ah, it was the obvious thought, especially for an old pervert like me." He said teasingly and Mai blushed, remembering what Rangiku had said. "And you're so cute when you blush like that."

"Oh, you…!" She wanted to hit him but they were on opposite sides of the table. It was a small table, but still. "I'm going to show you something tonight." Although she was sure it was nothing he hadn't seen before. Still, it would be a first from her.

"Really? I can't wait to see." She could tell he was teasing her again but just huffed and shook back her hair. He would be impressed when he saw it! Rangiku had picked it out for her and said it would make any man take notice.

She'd hung the little piece of lingerie up in the closet. So when they were ready to go to bed and she could hear Shunsui in the bathroom, she slipped into it. The silk felt cool against her skin and she paused for a moment to regard herself in the mirror. The straps weren't too comfortable but they were very attractive, and it wouldn't be staying on long anyway. Mai smiled and settled on the bed, waiting for her husband to finish brushing his teeth.

"Mai?" He sounded stunned as he stepped out of the bedroom and saw what was waiting on the bed for him. "What… how…?" Shunsui's eyes roamed over her body as she smiled at him, stretching out a bit.

"Rangiku-san picked it out for me. She said you would like it." Really, Mai thought it was a bit too trashy for her own tastes. She would have picked one of the solid silk baby dolls… but Rangiku had insisted this would blow Shunsui's socks off. From the look on his face, she had been right. Mai smiled as she ran a finger under the band of the panties. "It's a bit uncomfortable, though. I would like to take it off…" Her sexy tone was rather good now. From the way he swallowed as his gaze followed her finger, she was doing well.

"Then let me help you with that." Mai smiled as she was joined on the bed, his big hands finding her curves and beginning to ease away the black silk. "Ah, that looks marvelous on you." His finger dipped inside her panties and Mai moaned softly as she was teased. The smile on his face… "Would you mind if we did something different tonight?" He asked and she nodded.

"Please. I want you to teach me… everything…" She was so desperate to learn. Then his lips covered hers, silencing any further words. He didn't bother to fully remove the lingerie. Instead, he just popped her out of it, easing down the panties until they were no longer in the way. Vaguely, Mai wondered what was going to be new. This seemed quite familiar.

"I would like a new position." Shunsui breathed in her ear and Mai nodded. "On your hands and knees." Doggy style? She knew about that now, Rangiku had also picked out a book for her… excited by the thought, Mai kissed him before doing what he wanted. Then he was gripping her hips and sliding into her. The feeling of being filled, so completely, made her gasp. The position, though… as Shunsui began to take her, Mai found she didn't prefer it. There wasn't as much stimulation to her clit. It was still good but not as intense –

"AH!" Her breath came out in a surprised gasp as fingers found her nub, stroking her in that most sensitive of spots. "Shunsui!" She cried out his name as he chuckled in her ear, nuzzling and kissing the side of her throat. His thrusts inside her were so powerful, so fierce… Mai loved every moment of it as she felt him bounce a bit against her cervix. That mild pain enhanced the pleasure, making her toes curl. "Sh-Shunsui…" She was getting close.

"Cum for me, Mai." He breathed in her ear and that was all that was needed. She shuddered as she went over the edge, her insides clamping down hard on that cock that was pleasuring her. "Ah… kami…" He… wasn't stopping, though. No, he was going faster? "I'll make you cum again." He promised and she gasped, her eyes wide. Could he do that?

He was definitely going to try and Mai cried out in pleasure as a big hand cupped her breasts, squeezing them gently. That thick cock filled her, the thrusts gradually becoming faster and more urgent. Mai felt it as the pressure inside began to build again and Shunsui seemed to know… his hand left her breast to find her nub again and Mai's hands tore at the blankets as the pleasure came to a point. The second orgasm rolled over her as she cried out and he grunted behind her, stiffening sharply as his organ pulsed. Mai could feel the heat of it, the release filling her. It was… pleasant…

"Ah, Mai. You are such a beautiful woman…" Shunsui said as she gasped, slumping down on the blankets. Even through her exhaustion and bliss, though, she heard the odd note to his voice. Why did he always sound sad, when he said things like that? It was subtle but it was there. Then he was removing himself from her body and she turned onto her side to look up at him. He was moving to lie beside her, taking her into his arms.

"I love you Shunsui." She said impulsively, with all the trust of a young child. Her husband stiffened in surprise for a moment.

"You hardly know me at all, Mai." He told her and she looked at him with a pout. That just wasn't true.

"I know what you look like naked." She said sleepily as he chuckled. "Rangiku says half the Seireitei knows that but I don't care…" That just meant he was experienced. A hand went through her hair and she smiled, snuggling against chest. "I also know that you're tricky and you… don't like dogs…" She muttered, already falling asleep. She vaguely heard a surprised sound from him but ignored it, feeling warm and content.

This had been a wonderful night.

* * *

_Help me…_

_I can't breathe. I can't breathe. It's so dark, I can't move, please help me…_

_Someone. Anyone…_

_Don't… leave me… alone…_

_Please…_

* * *

"Mai?" A hand woke her from the terrifying dream. Mai coughed, blinking as she tried to fight off the sensation of something liquid filling her lungs. Always, it felt like drowning… "Mai?"

"Shunsui?" She asked groggily before realizing it was quite early. "Oh. Did I wake you? I'm sorry." She was rapidly coming to full wakefulness and felt quite embarrassed. That stupid nightmare… Shunsui was gazing at her with a small frown, his expression shadowed with concern.

"Are you alright? Your reiatsu was fluctuating. It was very powerful." He sounded troubled and Mai wondered why. Her lack of training? The power she possessed? "What were you dreaming about?"

"It was just a nightmare." She tried to brush it away. "I can make myself some tea. Perhaps you should go back to sleep?" It was quite early for him to be up. Shunsui shook his head, gently squeezing her shoulder.

"We can both have some tea and you can tell me about this nightmare." He said and Mai winced to herself. She really didn't like talking about it. Her aunts had been sympathetic at first, blaming it on her father's death. But as the problem persisted they had begun telling her she needed to get past her grief. Mai was certain the dream was completely unconnected to her father, but there was no telling them that. Pulling herself out of bed she found a robe, then went to the kitchen to fix some tea.

"It's really nothing important." Mai said as they both sipped their tea. Shunsui gave her a skeptical look.

"Mai, the way your reiatsu was fluctuating was alarming. If I hadn't known you were safe in bed, I would have thought you were in physical distress." He said and Mai blinked. No one had told her that before. "What was this nightmare?"

"…It's something I've had since I was a little girl." She admitted after a moment. "I feel like I'm trapped in a dark place. I can't move, can't see, and I can't breathe… it feels like I'm drowning. Although there's no water." That puzzled her a bit. Drowning without water… what was she drowning on? "And I feel so alone. Sometimes I think I'm not alone but then I realize I am…" That was always a horrible moment. Although she wasn't sure why. As an important scion of the Kuchiki family, she'd never been left alone in her life. Always, always there were servants, nannies and maids looking after her. Living with Shunsui was the closest to _alone_ she'd been in her life and she was enjoying it. Really, it was lovely to finally have some privacy.

"I see." Shunsui's expression was a bit withdrawn as he sipped his tea. "Have you ever seen anyone for this?" He asked and Mai grimaced before nodding.

"As a child I was rather loud… my aunts took me to several healers. They said it was just night terrors and nothing important." Mai was inclined to agree that it was nothing important. The nightmares were just annoying, nothing more. "It's only dreams." She said dismissively as he frowned at her.

"That's true but… Mai, you should get some training." Shunsui said and she shook her head, but he persisted. "You are much too strong to stay completely untrained. Did the Kuchiki clan put wards on your bedroom?" He asked and Mai blinked before blushing.

"Uh… yes. They did." She admitted in a small voice and saw her husband wince. "That's not good?" They had mostly treated it as an annoyance. Shunsui shook his head before giving her a reassuring smile.

"It's not good but we can fix it. Let me train you." Shunsui said and Mai chewed her lip. She really wasn't sure… "As your husband I must insist."

"…Oh." Mai sighed before nodding. He was the head of the household. If he was going to insist, she had to obey. "Should I come to your Division for that?" That would likely be practical. Shunsui nodded before reaching over the table to catch her hand.

"You just need to learn to control your reiatsu. You won't have to fight, Mai." He said reassuringly and she nodded. "I'll ask my Nanao-chan to teach you kido."

"Oh… that would be good… maybe healing?" That would be very nice. She would have children someday, it would be good to be able to treat any injuries. Shunsui seemed a bit dubious, though.

"Healing is difficult for those with very high reiatsu. But you can try." He said and Mai wondered why that was an impediment. Surely Unohana taichou had high reiatsu? But there might be a trick to it. "Perhaps you should come to the Division in, hmm, four days? That should give Nanao some time to get ready."

"Certainly." She agreed before pushing herself up from the table. "I should make us breakfast." They were both up and not going back to bed, it seemed. So it was time to eat. She went to the kitchen, quickly putting together some egg omelets as her husband sipped his tea.

She really wasn't interested in using a sword, but kido might be different. It would be interesting to see what her reiatsu could do.

* * *

Mai breached the water in one smooth move before smiling at the other woman in the pool. Nanao was floating on her back, just enjoying the warmth of the sun.

They were both taking a mid-day siesta. Mai's lessons weren't just an effort for her, they required quite a bit from her teacher. Nanao had to ward her, to make sure there would be no accidents with her power. Mai had known her reiatsu was high – Byakuya had told her so – but she hadn't realized quite how high. It took powerful kido to contain her.

So now they were both resting from their efforts and Mai sighed as she floated back in the water. The cool water and the warm sun both felt so good on her skin –

"CANNONBALL!" Her eyes went wide and then she and Nanao both screamed as a third person landed in the pool with a tremendous splash. They were both completely doused by the resultant wave and Mai sputtered as Nanao yelped.

"Kyoraku taichou! What are you doing?" She demanded as he surfaced from the water, grinning. Mai gave him a severe look but couldn't hold it when she happened to notice his swim trunks, beneath the water. Were they bright pink?

"Oh Nanao-chan, you both looked like you were having so much fun, I just had to join you! And I spotted Mai's lovely swimsuit~" She blushed darkly, glancing down. Her swimsuit was pure white and a one piece, but not the least bit modest. It left the middle of her body bared, all the way to her belly button. Her breasts were covered, mostly, but it did allow some teasing glimpses.

"Lecher!" Nanao splashed water at him, which only made him laugh. "Don't tell me to get one like it. I don't see how she can wear it!" That made her blush even more. Although…

"Rangiku-san said Shunsui would like it…" His grin widened before he laughed and went to her side, pulling her into a deep kiss. Mai melted against him, vaguely aware there were probably shinigami watching. Yet, she couldn't bring herself to care.

"Oh, I do indeed." He breathed in her ear as Mai settled against him, resting her hands on his chest. He was so big and strong… "But perhaps you would like to play a game? Who can make the biggest splash?" He asked cheerfully as he let her go and Mai shook her head with a smile. He would win that one handily.

"You're just hoping she'll knock off her swimsuit." Nanao said cynically as Mai blushed. Really, could that happen? She doubted it, it fit quite well. "Why don't we see who can dive the most neatly?" She said and Mai liked that idea.

"I'll start!" She offered before pulling herself out of the pool and going to the deep end. She made her dive as graceful as she could, almost kissing the water. Really, she could have dove safely in the shallow end. That made everyone so uncomfortable though…

"Very graceful! Now Nanao, your turn." Shunsui urged her and Mai watched with a smile. She had a feeling that Shunsui was just having fun watching them in their swimsuits, but she didn't mind.

This was a lovely way to spend the day.


	3. Chapter 3

"I hate using it. It's almost too easy… but her upbringing does make it so easy for me to get my way." Shunsui said cheerfully as they played a game of shogi. Juushiro blinked at his best friend, not understanding. "Mai. She was raised by her aunts, or rather Byakuya's aunts."

"Oh!" Now he understood and shook his head with a smile. "She has an extremely traditional view of marriage?" He and Shunsui were both well-acquainted with that attitude. That a wife must completely obey her husband… it had been the prevailing thought, when they'd been young. Although everyone had known it might be different behind closed doors.

"Mmm hmm. Apparently, she's been trained in every 'womanly skill.'" Shunsui sounded a bit bemused by it all. "She can cook, clean and sew. She can tend a garden and knows the tricks for how to preserve fruits and vegetables." Juushiro blinked at that.

"I would have thought the Kuchiki women relied on their servants for that." He said mildly, although those skills were quite traditional. Shunsui took a drink of his sake as he made his move on the board.

"Mmm, apparently the aunts had her trained exactly as they were. And they were taught everything they might need to know in case they married and started a cadet branch." Shunsui shrugged. "Two of them did, apparently, and the lessons came in handy."

"Ah." A cadet branch would often be quite poor, to begin with. The larger clan typically gave them something to get started but the first few years, even decades were hard, as the young family struggled to establish themselves. "So she can stage parties on a budget, has impeccable manners and can dance any style?" That would also be the 'typical' repertoire of skills. Shunsui sighed.

"Oh yes, all that. She also writes some rather terrible poetry." He said more cheerfully and Juushiro blinked. "It's almost as bad as mine! I feel like we're soul mates!"

"Shunsui!" Juushiro couldn't help but laugh. "I'm glad you're getting along." It certainly sounded like he was well kept. Shunsui smiled as he opened his bento box, then paused, an odd look on his face. "Hm?"

"…My lunch seems to be upset with me." He said and Juushiro had to see what he was talking about. When he did, he smiled. He recognized it even if Shunsui didn't.

"Angry birds." Mai had used fruit to make two red birds, looking suitably cross. "Oh, that's cute, she used the pork chop to make a pig. They're from a cell phone game." Shunsui knew how to use a phone, but only to call people. He was completely ignorant of apps and games. "I saw Sentaro and Kiyone playing it." And they had been quite competitive about their scores. Shunsui chuckled, softly.

"Ah, I see." He regarded the food with a smile that struck Juushiro as melancholy. "We really have very little in common." He said softly and Juushiro gently squeezed his hand.

"You'll make memories together." Really, how could Shunsui and Mai have much in common right now? They came from completely different generations. Shunsui had been born when horses and swords were used in the Living World. Mai had been born into a time when cell phones were everywhere… although at least Soul Society still used swords. They weren't as far apart as they could have been. "And I can't wait to spoil a little Kyoraku junior rotten!" He said brightly, which made his best friend and lover look up wide-eyed. "Is there one on the way?"

"Juu!" Shunsui burst into laughter and Juushiro smiled. He'd been hoping that would cheer him up. "You're horrible! My poor child… you will, too, won't you?"

"Absolutely! You know, you should invite me over for supper." He said thoughtfully. "I would like to get to know her." Mai sounded very sweet and while it felt odd, given what they were hiding from her, Juushiro really did want to play with their children and give them candy. The one thing he'd always regretted about being the way he was, was the lack of any children. Now, though, he could have the next best thing. Shunsui gave him a thoughtful look.

"I suppose I should. It feels odd…" Juushiro could imagine why, since Shunsui was essentially cheating on his wife with him. However, they had been lovers for a very long time. "But I think you would like her. In some ways, she reminds me of you." He admitted and Juushiro blinked. It was the first time he'd heard that. "She's very peaceful. Perhaps next week?"

"Please!" After setting a date for that, they took the opportunity to cast several concealing kidos and then reaffirm their feelings for each other. It was a bit daring, in the middle of the day, but that was the reason Shunsui had never wanted to marry.

Still, despite the danger, they would not turn aside.

* * *

"You are a high class bitch."

"…?" Mai blinked behind her sunglasses, turning to see who would address her so rudely. The person in question was a shinigami. He wore the usual uniform, but with a bright blue scarf around his waist. His hair was jet black and his eyes were a very beautiful blue. He was really quite handsome but the leer on his face badly detracted. "…Do I know you?" There was something so oddly familiar about him. Yet, Mai was certain she'd never met this unmannerly stranger in her life.

"Shouldn't think so. But would you like to? You are one sexy dame." That sounded a bit better than 'high class bitch', in her opinion. His eyes roved over her body and it made her slightly uncomfortable, although her sundress was completely suitable for a warm summer day.

"Do you usually harass random women having lunch in a park?" She returned, annoyed. Really, she had a picnic basket, was sitting on a blanket and minding her own business. Why was he bothering her? And besides… "I'm married." He suddenly grinned.

"Oh, I love married women! Especially the ones that haven't had sex in years 'cause the hubby's too busy at 'work'…" His tone was insinuating and Mai's lips tightened.

"You're a filthy beast." She said before suddenly moving with an impulse. She lay down, flopping down on her side as though she was about to nap. There was a surprised silence behind her.

"…Okay. That's weirdly familiar. I'm out of here…" She felt him go and was massively relieved. Sitting up, she went back to enjoying her lunch and the bright sun. The egg and watercress sandwiches were really very delicious. This was all very –

"Woah, hot stuff!" What was this?! Turning she glared at an extremely tall shinigami. He was grinning at her, revealing very large teeth. "Jo said there was a classy bitch here but I thought he was a fucking liar~" His leer was even worse than the earlier one.

"Get away from me or I'll tell my husband about you." Mai said sharply. Really, this was getting on her last nerve. She just wanted to eat her lunch. Was it too much to ask? His grin widened and she was sure he was going to say something crude. Flipping herself to her feet, Mai glared at him as her reiatsu became turbulent. His grin faded as he felt that power.

"Hey, do I know you?" He said and she blinked. His grin did seem familiar, too. Although she was sure she'd never met these louts in her life. "Uh, yeah, you're a strong bitch… think I'll go…" He suddenly seemed intimidated and abruptly left, making her frown. That was strange…

Feeling a bit perturbed, Mai shook out her blanket and put it away, taking it and the basket home. Perhaps she'd enjoyed the sun enough for today. And she really needed to get supper ready. She was thinking of making something special tonight, a French cafloutis recipe she'd found in a magazine… Soon she was humming as she walked home, her mind caught up in household matters. The two rude strangers completely left her mind.

Really, they weren't very important.

* * *

"…And here's neko-chan!" Mai said cheerfully as the very large black cat stared at Shunsui, a bit cross-eyed. He stared back, taken aback by the size of it.

"He's huge! Where did you find such a monster?" He asked before reaching out to scratch pointed ears. The cat reacted with feline bliss, rubbing his head hard against Shunsui's hand. "Very friendly though."

"The local pet sanctuary. I told them I wanted an adult, very friendly, and they said he would be perfect. And he's pure black, I like that." Black cats suited her quite well. Mai thought the poor things were often considered unlucky but really had lovely temperaments. "Do you like him?" She had asked Shunsui if he minded having a cat, of course. Mai might have preferred a dog but she knew Shunsui didn't like them. Although when he'd told her that, she couldn't recall.

"He's wonderful." Shunsui said with a smile as he scratched their new cat beneath his chin. Green eyes were half-closed in pleasure as he accepted the caresses. "Does he have a name yet?"

"Just neko-chan." That wasn't really much of a name, though. "I thought you might like to name him." Mai had all kinds of ideas for what they could call him, but she wanted to involve Shunsui in this.

"Hmmm. He looks like… Ito. Yes, Ito. How does that sound?" He asked and Mai smiled. Short but dignified, it did suit their monster of a cat.

"He'll be Ito then. Although I think I'll call him neko-chan." Mai snuggled the cat playfully, then blinked as he shoved his head against her, hard. Then he yowled, making them both flinch. "Oh, you're hungry. You ate all your food already?" Glancing over she saw that he had. "I'll get you something neko-chan…" She had a feeling she would be feeding him quite a bit. But he was a big cat with a big appetite. Smiling to herself, she went to the pantry to find some cat food. "Will your friend be here soon?"

"Yes, he should be. He loves cats, you know." Shunsui sounded a bit sad and Mai gave him a curious look as she laid down the food for Ito. He was rubbing against her legs as he purred, sensing the food coming. "He can't own one himself. His disease… the cat hair irritates his lungs."

"Oh. That won't be a problem?" She asked, concerned. She didn't want to make Juushiro sick. She hadn't really met him yet, just seen him at their wedding. But she knew that he and Shunsui were quite close. He shook his head with a small smile.

"No, he'll be fine. It's not an allergy, he just can't have one of his own." He said lightly and Mai nodded. Ito had his face in the food dish, eating hungrily. When he was done the cat sauntered away before jumping into the window sill, the very picture of a pampered feline.

Mai was very well trained and she struck the perfect balance between being a hostess and being in the kitchen. She greeted Juushiro as he arrived and soon had the food out, sushi and miso soup. She smiled as they ate, pleased that they were enjoying the food. And soon they were chatting about various things. Mai didn't understand when they talked about their Divisions but she was interested in some of the gossip. And Juushiro soon had some questions…

"You know, we really don't know much about you. Are you interested in having children?" He asked and Mai blushed lightly before smiling and sipping her tea.

"Oh yes." She said immediately, noticing that Shunsui was a touch wide-eyed. But then, he was quite old and had never had children. He hadn't said anything and they weren't using precautions, but he might be less than enthusiastic about babies. "My greatest wish is to be a mother." That was something she desired with all her heart. And since she didn't want to be a shinigami, that was her place in life. Mai thought she was lucky that reality and desire intersected so neatly. "And sadly, I don't have many other talents."

"That's not true at all!" Shunsui protested and Mai blinked at him, surprised. "Nanao says you're wonderful at kido."

"Oh…" That was true but… "I can't do healing kido. I just can't make the connection." She said sadly. Every time she tried, her reiatsu was out of sync with the person she was trying to heal and just made things worse. Nanao had explained that it was often like that. Healing was an uncommon talent and most of those who had it went to the Fourth. "I suppose the shielding is useful." Since she didn't want to hurt anyone the rest of her lessons were interesting but not that applicable. "I meant artistic talents." She couldn't draw well, couldn't write well and her abilities with music were only average. She was good at math and budgeting, though. If she had been born without power Mai thought she might have made a good accountant or shop girl. "Oh well." It would have been nice to have some ability that screamed _this is your purpose_ but most people didn't have that. She would get by.

"You really would make a fine shinigami." Juushiro said and Mai winced. "Of course, it's fine not to want that." He said comfortingly and she couldn't help but smile. He was such a warm presence.

"Thank you." She said before sipping her tea. "Tell me, do you have a family?" She knew almost nothing about him.

"Oh yes. I have a brother and several sisters…" Mai listened as Juushiro told him about his family. They were a minor clan but very close and loving. She felt a touch wistful. "What was your family like? Shunsui has mentioned you were raised by your aunts."

"Oh. Well, my mother was there until I was a teenager." Mai said before deciding she should explain. She hadn't really gone into this with Shunsui. "Mama married a younger son of a minor clan. They were trying to establish themselves and doing fairly well, but then we all went to his family for a visit and there was an accident." Her heart hurt a little, remembering. Her memories of her father were so vague and distant but she remembered crying herself sick after he died. "After that she went home and took me with her. She raised me with the help of her sisters."

"Why are so many of Byakuya's aunts unmarried? I've always wondered." Shunsui said thoughtfully and Mai smiled a touch. She'd often wondered that too, although she knew the answer.

"Well, you see, none of them have high reiatsu and only one of them was a great beauty. The others are all average." Mai didn't feel cruel saying that. One of her aunts had said it in front of her. "And back then, Sojun and his wife were both alive and well. There was no reason to think his sisters would ever be important to the Kuchiki clan so they weren't given dowries." That hadn't been very nice of their parents, but maybe they'd not wanted to bankrupt the clan. There had been seven of them. "So they could only marry younger sons, which involves some hardship. The beauty and one of the others married but the others stayed home." Although one of them had had a child, unmarried. Not that she was going to mention that. It was considered a disgrace and not spoken of. Shunsui smiled cheerfully.

"And was the beauty your mother?" He asked and Mai smiled. Everyone made that mistake.

"No, actually. My mother wasn't very beautiful but she was extremely sweet." She said lightly. Mai sometimes wished her mother hadn't been quite so sweet. She'd often let her sisters make all the decisions. "She was a bit fragile, though, and died of an illness when I was in my teens." She missed her sometimes. "I wish she had been here to see my wedding. She would have been very proud." That she was marrying a taichou, a clan heir, and a handsome man on top of it… her mother would have been misty eyed. "But I'm talking too much about myself. I know you used to have an older brother but do you have any other siblings?" She asked Shunsui. Really, she knew very little about his family except that his mother was dead and his father was extremely ill and mostly gone, mentally. He hadn't been able to attend their wedding, although Shunsui's grandmother had.

"Oh, I have three brothers and two sisters. None, alas, as powerful as I am." He said lightly and Mai nodded. Power was very important for a clan head. "Only one has shikai. Some of the youngsters do have promise, though. I haven't had much to do with them for centuries." It was faint, just a touch really, but Mai could hear the bitterness there. Was Shunsui estranged from his clan, or some of it at least?

"Except your grandmother." Juushiro put in and Mai smiled at him, feeling Shunsui's mood lightening. "She's very nice."

"Oh yes, she is. She has teeth, though, and if you get on her bad side you'll find that out!" He said with a small laugh and Mai felt a touch wistful. Her mother hadn't had any fangs to speak of. Glancing around, she saw they'd done a good job at finishing their meal. She began cleaning up, taking the dishes to the kitchen and putting together the dessert. It was light little white cakes with green tea ice cream. Carrying it out, Mai smiled as she saw the two of them quietly talking. They both looked up as she set down the bowls. Although…

"Would anyone like tea?" She asked and Juushiro and Shunsui both looked up at her. Juushiro nodded while Shunsui shook his head with a smile. "Just a moment." It really wouldn't take long. The beautiful sakura tea she'd gotten took only forty-five seconds to steep, according to the label and she had a kido water heater. Humming happily, she soon brought out the tea cups. They were both sampling their dessert when she set them out. "How is it?" She asked, a touch anxiously. She hadn't made the tea but she had definitely made the cake.

"It's wonderful." Juushiro said warmly and Mai dimpled at him before trying her own dessert. She thought it was good but she was a biased audience.

"Would you like to play hearts?" She asked hopefully. Her aunts had loved card games and had taught her all kinds of variations. It was no good with two people, however. She and Shunsui usually played shogi but he always won.

"Certainly. I've never played that but I would love to learn." Juushiro said and Mai was a bit surprised that he didn't know the game. Byakuya did… perhaps it was a family thing? The rules were simple, though, and they were soon getting the hang of it.

Mai had a wonderful time, sipping her tea, eating ice cream and playing cards. Eventually, though, Juushiro had to go. Mai considered doing the dishes but then decided to save them for the next day. There was something else she wanted to do… following Shunsui into the bedroom she watched him getting ready for bed. She smiled to herself, disrobing as he looked for his pajamas. He clearly wasn't expecting anything but she had other plans…

"Mai?" Shunsui was startled as her arms went around her, her naked body pressing up against his back. "What are you doing?" He questioned and she giggled, resting her cheek on his shoulder. She was shorter.

"Something new." New from her, at least. There was absolutely no chance Shunsui was a stranger to this. "Turn around." He did, frowning slightly.

"Mai, I'm an old man…" She ignored his protest as she kneeled in front of him. "Mai?!" There was surprise in his voice as she examined his penis for a moment. Rangiku had told her all about how to do this and claimed that men loved it… gripping that length she – "You shouldn't – " She gently licked him, tasting the soft skin. It was… plastic? Mai blinked as she realized it was… gummy? Some kind of residue? But from what? Setting that aside she did what Rangiku had suggested and took it into her mouth, creating suction – "Mai… ah…" He was becoming hard and that made it easier. Mai found that her sensitivity was very useful… she easily evaluated his reactions and began learning what pleased him best. Shunsui's fingers combed through Mai's hair as she took him further back in her throat, enjoying the warm pulse of his member, the evidence that she was pleasing him. "Oh kami, Mai…" She gently caressed his heavy sacks, rolling them in her hands. She loved the smell of him, his warm and slightly spicy musk.

Mai deeply enjoyed the whole experience. She found that Shunsui liked the feeling of her tongue, but he liked the way she hollowed her cheeks and created extra suction more. And he loved it when she took him as deeply as she could. But she had to be careful, she could choke. Rangiku had mentioned that. The scent of him was filling her nostrils and she half-closed her eyes, enjoying it as his hands gripped her hair… she could feel the way his member was pulsing and thought he was getting close.

"Mai, I'm going to…" He groaned and she thought she was ready. The burst of cum still surprised her, though, and she almost choked. She managed to swallow most of had to pull away, coughing a bit as she wiped errant trails away. "Kami! Where did you learn that?" He asked, his breathing still a bit ragged. Mai smiled up at him before kissing his thigh.

"Rangiku-san taught me and I bought a book." She said candidly and he chuckled, a low, amused sound. "Do you want to go to bed?" He wasn't a young man and certainly wouldn't be able to satisfy her now. But that was fine. Mai had done that for him, because she'd wanted to, not for herself. But he smiled at her, a twinkle in his eye.

"Oh, I think we should do more than that…" Mai blinked in surprise as she was scooped up and carried to the bed. He was so strong…! She was deposited onto the covers and gasped as he joined her, kissing her throat and exploring her body with big hands. But surely he was…? "Ah, Mai, you are so beautiful." He murmured in her ear and she shivered at the warmth of his breath. Then he was exploring her throat and she moaned, tangling her hands in that thick chestnut hair.

"Shunsui…" His attentions were going straight to her libido, giving her intense pleasure. "Oh kami!" Her hips bucked as he slid a hand between her legs, sliding a finger into her sex. "Oh…" She met his eyes and they kissed, even as he teased her. The warmth of his lips, the brush of his beard… Mai thought she was in heaven.

Then he moved and she watched with confusion as he went down her body, gripping her thighs and parting them as he smiled up at her, teasingly. Then her eyes went wide as he knelt between her thighs.

"Oh!" She gasped as he slowly, luxuriously drew his tongue through her damp folds before teasing her clit. "Shunsui…!" That felt incredible and she whimpered, writhing in his grip as he found that sensitive nub and slowly sucked. "Kami…!" Then his finger slid back inside her and she cried out, her eyes wide. He hadn't done this for her before…

Mai was soon reduced to a quivering mess, her body reacting with animal intensity as she gripped the blankets, murmuring her husband's name. When he brought her to orgasm she cried out, her whole body tensing as the pleasure rolled over her. She was left trembling and gasping, shuddering in the aftermath as Shunsui pulled away, wiping off his lips. Vaguely, she wondered what that tasted like. Were her juices the same as his?

But that was a silly thought and Mai smiled blissfully as he moved back up, joining her on the bed. Strong arms went around her and she settled against him with a sigh.

"You are so wonderful." She murmured, knowing she was still probably in the honeymoon phase. Yet, she really felt that way. Shunsui gently kissed her, running a hand through her hair.

"So are you. Ah, Mai… go to sleep." He sounded so gentle, so loving. Smiling to herself, Mai allowed herself to drift off.

Her life was absolutely wonderful.


	4. Chapter 4

The house of cards came down much sooner than expected.

Juushiro and Shunsui knew that things were riskier, now, but they truly thought they could keep it up. Their optimism was, perhaps, just a consequence of the circumstances. They had no other choice unless they wanted to end their relationship and neither of them could face that. So they convinced themselves they could keep it going. Unfortunately, fate had other plans.

Mai wandered through the store, nearly bursting with happiness. Rangiku and Momo were both there, although this was not where they'd planned to go at all. And they'd meant to stay out late, going to a restaurant and then the bars to dance. It was a 'girls night out' and Shunsui had laughed when she'd diffidently asked if he minded. All that had changed this morning, though, when she'd gotten the news. Shunsui was going to be so surprised!

"Oh, these are so cute~!" Momo said as she picked up a small box. Mai looked at the contents, beaming.

"Oh they are! And they're yellow and green, that's perfect." Everything they were picking out had to be gender non-specific. It was too early to know the sex. Rangiku had frankly admitted she wasn't into babies but she was definitely into shopping. Shopping for baby clothes was the best part, in her opinion.

"Can we get some dresses? Just in case it's a girl?" She asked brightly and Mai decided that was fine. The Kyoraku clan was rich, after all, and none of this was expensive. That let them dive into the incredibly pretty little gowns and yukata meant for infants.

"What will you do if it's a boy?" Momo asked and Mai thought about it a moment as she made the payment.

"See if anyone in the Eighth needs them. If not, take them to a charity." That would be quite suitable. And very kind, too. Little babies in adorable little dresses… Mai was a bit misty eyed at the thought. "Oh, I hope it's a girl." Just so she could buy plenty of beautiful clothes. Boys were wonderful but you just couldn't dress them up like you would a girl.

"I think that's wonderful." Momo said warmly and Mai smiled, feeling blindingly happy. Running a hand over her belly, she imagined what her child would look like. A sweet little girl or a bright little boy? Would he or she look like Shunsui?

She parted with her friends, then, going home. Going to the bedroom she cleaned out one of the drawers, moving the contents – where were most of her socks? Ito liked to carry them off and play with them – and replaced them with the neatly folded baby clothes. Little dresses were hung up on hangers as she hummed to herself. Then she considered her own clothing. Maybe she should change? And what was she going to make for supper? Ah, perhaps they should just order in…

Mai was still considering what to wear when she heard a sound. The door opening? It seemed rather early for Shunsui to get home, though. Then she heard something… very odd. A moan? And then Shunsui's voice.

"Juu…" He was in the bedroom? Curious and a touch shocked, she peeked out the half-open closet door. Then her mouth fell open and her shock deepened as she saw her husband disrobing his best friend.

Mai stared, watching the two men touching each other in such a familiar way. She knew she should be horrified – men were not supposed to do that to other men, or so she'd been taught anyway – but she didn't feel it. She mostly felt a strange fascination as she watched Shunsui treating Juushiro so lovingly. It was different from how he made love to her – how could it not be? They weren't the same genders – but it was much the same. And as she watched them fall into the bed, her reeling mind connected the dots. _This is why he didn't want to marry. This is why he –_

And then a cat jumped on her head.

Ito hadn't meant any harm. He'd just been sleeping in one of the upper shelves and upon waking, had spotted Mai in a very convenient location. He'd meant to just bounce off her back, something he'd done before. However, this time she was taken completely by surprise and in the act of leaning forward. Mai's shriek and fall forward caught Shunsui's and Juushiro's attention and they stared, naked and tangled around each other as she fell flat on the floor. A terrified cat dashed out of the room, leaving his mistress on the ground. Mai lay there in shock for a moment before pulling herself up.

"Oh! I – I'm so sorry!" She spoke very quickly, holding up her hands as she smiled with manic cheerfulness. Shunsui looked as stunned as she'd felt when she first saw them. Juushiro was starting to look horrified. "I didn't mean to interrupt! I'll – I'll go make some tea!" With that, she fled, ignoring Shunsui's voice calling her name. "Tea…?" That… seemed like the only reasonable thing to do. Unless she was going to run to Byakuya but Mai was an intelligent woman. She knew what was going on now and that wasn't the best way to handle it.

She was preparing tea when a hastily dressed Shunsui arrived in the kitchen. He was breathing heavily and he touched her shoulder as she looked up from the tea. The look on his face… Mai saw so many emotions there. Shock, guilt, fear, almost dread…

"Mai, kami, I'm sorry." He said huskily and she couldn't stand that look. Abandoning the tea, she hugged him tightly.

"Shh. It's alright." She murmured, able to feel his trembling. And she knew why. If she requested a divorce everyone would have to know why and the damage this would do to Shunsui would be… bad. How bad? That depended on his status with his clan. What he'd said about being estranged from his siblings, though, sounded ominous. "Please, I'll make you both tea." She thought they needed it. He laughed, although it sounded suspiciously like a sob. "Shunsui." She reached up to cup his cheek, feeling the whiskers beneath her palm. "It's going to be fine." Mai said as soothingly as she could, reflecting that it was odd she was doing this. She was the one who'd just discovered a huge betrayal but… it didn't really feel that way. "Please, take a seat while I make us some tea." The soothing routine was, well, soothing.

"Mai… alright." Shunsui knew what she was up to. She let him go, giving him an encouraging smile. Then she went back to the tea.

When she brought it out, Juushiro and Shunsui were both sitting at the table. Juushiro looked very pale and was avoiding looking at her, murmuring a soft thanks as she gave him his tea. Shunsui was looking at her with a very guilty expression. Mai gave him his tea with a small smile before taking her seat.

"Mai, I'm so sorry." He said, just looking at his tea. Juushiro looked away as Mai picked up her cup, feeling the heat of it.

"Shunsui, it's fine." She said calmly, taking a sip of her tea. "I see why you didn't want to get married, now." It was all so clear to her. They had always been lovers. Mai tested her feelings and found that the thought of two men together still didn't bother her. But then, while her aunts came from a generation with strong feelings about such things, Mai had been born into a different time. "And that's why your bedroom is an interior room." That had always puzzled her a bit because there was another room, currently being used for storage, that was really meant to be a bedroom. It had a nice picture window. A plus for any normal couple but not so good if you wanted to hide something. Juushiro looked at her then.

"You're not angry?" He asked tentatively and Mai shook her head, taking another sip of her tea. "I… will you…" Juushiro trailed off, looking away again and Shunsui completed the thought with a brittle smile.

"Divorce me?" He asked and Mai winced a little at the tone. "Ah… of course you will. This will be so…" He rubbed his forehead and Mai hastened to correct him.

"I'm not leaving you." They both stared at her and she had to explain. "If this had started after we married I would ask for a divorce tomorrow." She said softly and saw him wince. "But that's not what's going on here, is it?" She would be shocked if it was. "You've been lovers for a very long time." Much, much longer than she'd been alive. Shunsui nodded, a deep sadness on his face. Juushiro finally tried his tea, watching her worriedly. "I don't mind…" She blushed as she looked into her tea. It seemed a bit… odd… sharing her husband with another man. But their relationship vastly predated hers and Shunsui had done everything he could to avoid marriage.

"Don't mind?" Shunsui sounded incredulous. "How can you not _mind?_ " He asked and Mai fumbled a little. It was odd but…

"Shunsui, I know I was forced on you by your clan." She said sincerely and saw him swallow. "I… care for you, very much. And I like you too." She said to Juushiro, who stared at her, his brown eyes wide. "And I know what a divorce might do to you. Both our clans would have to know why." And she would have to give them the truth. Only something that spectacular could assure the divorce would go through. It wouldn't harm her reputation much but it would utterly ruin Shunsui and possibly Juushiro, too. "And I… um…" Mai hesitated. This wasn't the way she'd wanted to tell him. Yet, it was an important factor in her decision. "Can you hold on a moment?" She asked before quickly leaving the table. She went back to the bedroom, to the closet, to find a little box.

When she came back out, Shunsui and Juushiro were quietly talking. They stopped as they saw her and she smiled shyly before gently setting down the tiny box in front of him. Shunsui gave her an odd look before opening the box and stopping, just staring at the contents.

"Mai." He said softly, looking at the green and yellow, woolen baby booties. Juushiro peeked past his shoulder and his eyes went wide again as he saw the little shoes. "You're…?" He asked and she nodded, watching his expression with a flutter of anxiousness. She still wasn't sure how he felt about children. How would he…? "Mai…" Shunsui breathed and she blinked as he suddenly surged out of his seat and she found herself soundly hugged. "Kami, I never… this is why you want to stay?" He asked and she shook her head, still cuddled warmly against his chest.

"I could always go home. My aunts would love to help me raise a baby." Kami knew that was true. Not that she'd want to put her child through that. Her aunts would never see her as a grown woman and would try to steamroll her, just the way they had her mother. Mai could see that coming a mile away. "I want to stay for you." Mai felt his breath hitch, as she breathed in his warm, masculine scent. She felt so safe in his arms. A warm hand ran through her hair, cupping her cheek, lifting her head. Their eyes met and Mai smiled at the slightly stunned look on his face.

"I don't deserve you." He whispered and Mai giggled before kissing him soundly. She wasn't happy about this, exactly, but at least she understood now. The mystery of his long bachelorhood was solved. And she was still so happy about her baby. Although…

"Since I think I've completely killed the mood, would you like to play cards?" She asked Juushiro as she pulled away from Shunsui. "We can order in supper and have a bit of a party." She thought it would be very fun. He smiled at her, his brown eyes warm.

"I would love that. Chinese food?" He asked and they quickly picked out a place and sent a message. The returning message said it would be an hour and could they pick it up, please? Shunsui chuckled at that and sent back a quick affirmative. It would be no trouble for him and Juushiro, with their shunpo. Mai was getting a reasonable grasp of that as well, although she was nowhere near as fast as a taichou. But then, why would she ever need to be? Mai smiled as she made more tea.

It was almost a relief to have everything in the open. There were no more secrets, now.

* * *

Mai cheerfully walked home, enjoying the warmth of the autumn day.

She was coming home late, but this was by arrangement. Mai wanted to give her husband and his lover privacy and use the opportunity to spend 'girl time' with Momo and Rangiku. Tonight she'd gone dancing and was very much dressed for it. Instead of a yukata or kimono, she was wearing a white scuba dress with colorful, rosette flowers. The heavy fabric felt wonderful and she wore knee-high white boots. A white bag was slung over her shoulder and she hummed as she walked, almost skipping. She hadn't been able to drink much – just one glass of wine – but she'd still had a wonderful time.

Mai's steps slowed as she felt something… strange. Turning slightly, she looked around, feeling like she was really seeing the street for the first time in months. The sweet little homes, so cute and so expensive… the mature trees, casting shade and adding beauty to the neighborhood. Mai came to a complete stop by one, running her fingers over the rough bark. The slightly damp trunk – there had been rain this morning – felt marvelous beneath her fingers. Mai looked up but it was hard to see the stars. She could see the moon, though. It was a full moon and shone with an almost surreal light.

Swallowing, Mai blinked and stepped back from the tree. Her head felt… odd. Not a headache, but a strange feeling. And why was she feeling… like…?

_I am being watched._ The thought was her own yet sounded strangely like a man. Mai spared that no attention because it had perfectly encapsulated her dread. Quickly hurrying away, she broke into a trot. Not quite running, but close. She almost heard a rustling, a shifting on the wind that made her think of wings. Then she reached her own home and hurried inside, breathing a sigh of relief as that feeling thinned and vanished.

Yet, the strange shift inside her head was not going away.

* * *

Mai sucked on the end of her pencil, looking at the paper in front of her.

She knew she was awful at poetry. There was no point in denying it. Mai didn't write it for anyone else, anyway. She used it as a tool to express her feelings. Resting her pencil on the paper, she began to write.

_The sand was cold and heavy, the light was pale and wan.  
'Neath those empty barren sands he came to me,  
He told me I was important, he told me I was strong,  
And when he bid me follow I stood and walked along._

_Why is it important to be special?  
A blessing to be the best?  
I think sometimes that normal,  
Is truly to be blessed._

Mai tapped her mouth with her pencil, looking at the piece of poetry. If she closed her eyes, she could almost see those barren sands. And towers of… dirt? No, not dirt. Broken rocks? Licking her lips, she shook her head before putting her pencil to the paper again and writing an idle thought.

_Do I want to be important?_

Then her hand seemed to move without thought.

_NO._ The big block lettering surprised her and Mai blinked at it before tilting her head to one side.

_Why?_ She wrote on the paper, not expecting an answer. But then, to her faint surprise, she wrote a reply to herself. It was printed, very neat and legible but not like her usual handwriting.

_If you are important you are noticed. If you are noticed there are expectations. If there are expectations there is pressure. If there is pressure there is danger. If there is danger there is death. Death is terrible. Why would anyone want to be important?_

"I… don't know." Mai whispered as she looked at the logic. It sent a shiver down her spine because it was a good rendition of why she didn't want to be a shinigami. Then she heard a door open and shut the notebook before opening a drawer and hiding it in the desk. It was nothing she wanted to show Shunsui. Not because it was bad – his writing was atrocious – but just… something else.

"Ah, Mai." Warm arms went around her from behind and Mai relaxed as Shunsui nuzzled her affectionately. "I smell something wonderful. Is that stew?"

"Mmm hmm." Mai hummed in pleasure before sliding out of her chair. "Beef citrus and chili stew. I found the recipe in a magazine." She'd tasted it, too, and thought it was delicious. "And rice and I was going to fry some kohlrabi greens." She'd bought some beautiful kohlrabi and the greens were edible. "We can add them to the stew." Mai said and saw Shunsui make a face. She poked his side playfully. "Be a good example to your future offspring!"

"Oh Mai. I can't even see him yet." He complained before running a hand over her still flat belly. Mai blushed before punching him a bit more strongly. "Ow. Oh, do you mind if Juushiro comes over for supper?"

"Not at all, as long as I can have you afterwards." She said immediately. Mai was feeling frisky and wanted her husband to herself tonight. Shunsui chuckled, the skin around his eyes crinkling as he smiled. Mai thought it was adorable.

"You know, I'm an old man. You're both wearing me out." Shunsui teased gently and Mai smiled. She knew now that was rather true. Still, it was very funny.

"Too much sex, poor you." She teased right back and Shunsui chuckled. "How many men would like to be in your place~" Well, not entirely. If Juushiro was a beautiful woman, definitely. They kissed again and Mai savored it. She was tempted to start something right now but Juushiro would be there soon.

Supper was wonderful, served with a smooth red wine that complimented the flavors. Mai limited herself to a single glass. Unohana had said that a small amount of alcohol would not hurt her child, but she could have no more than that. Mixed with the stew, the kohlrabi greens and rice gave just the right amount of crunch.

"This is wonderful. Is that lime juice?" Juushiro asked and Mai dimpled at him. She knew now that he'd been the one who enjoyed cooking. Shunsui could do a few basic things but overall was rather helpless.

"Yes, and orange juice. That touch of heat is chili flakes." It was very mild and pleasant. "The best part is that it's perfect for the slow cooker." That would be practical for Juushiro. She had plenty of time to create elaborate meals, but he had plenty of work.

"Perhaps I could have the recipe?" He asked and Mai nodded with a smile.

"Of course! I'll copy it for you, it's from a magazine." That would be no trouble. "Do you know what happened to me a few days ago…?" Soon she was telling them an amusing story of a man at the club who hadn't taken no for an answer until Rangiku had promised to remove his entrails via his nostrils if he didn't go away. That had finally gotten rid of him. "And I've joined a young mother's group in the neighborhood." Mai said happily. Shunsui had a bit of a deer-in-the-headlights look at that but Juushiro was delighted.

"I can't wait to see the child. Do you have any ideas on the name?" He asked and Mai hesitated. They hadn't really gone into it much since they didn't know the sex yet. But she did have a few ideas.

"Well, I thought if it was a boy I might like to name him after my father." She admitted, glancing at Shunsui. He looked thoughtful. "His name was Ryuunosuke. So, Kyoraku Ryuunosuke." She thought that sounded nice. "I'm not sure about a girl but I like the name Aoi." That was just something she liked.

"You wouldn't want to name a girl after your mother?" Shunsui asked and Mai grimaced before shaking her head.

"Her name was Miki. I know it's silly but every time I hear it I think of Micky Mouse." She said frankly and Shunsui laughed as Juushiro smiled. "I had several story books about him as a child and my aunts bought me all kinds of toys of him. Maybe as a middle name but to call my child that every day…" It just didn't work. Shunsui chuckled but there was something sad in his eyes.

"I had a sister. Her name was Amiko. Perhaps we could consider that?" Mai tested the name and thought it was good. She liked the sound of it. "And my grandmother's name is Ran. Although she already has several namesakes."

"Ran?" Mai hadn't even considered that name and thought it was enchanting. "I like that. Although if there are already other grandchildren using it, that might be a problem." Too much confusion? Perhaps. "We have plenty of time to think about it." She was only on her second month and not showing much, yet. Glancing over the table she saw they'd polished off their food. She began clearing the plates away. "Would you like to play cards?" She asked hopefully. "Or perhaps a board game?" They had a very nice one called Settlers of Catan.

"Cards would be good. Perhaps Bug Up?" Shunsui said and Mai nodded. That game had a great deal of skill involved because you had to bet how many tricks you would make, each round. Predicting that was important. Putting the dishes into the sink she made them some tea as Juushiro found the cards and began to shuffle. She brought them out with some custard biscuits for dessert. As they played, she kept the score. At one point, Mai realized she was doodling and glanced down to see what she'd written in the margins.

_Lilynette?_ That name, written so questioningly, gave her an odd chill. And it was such a strange name… who would name their child that? Yet, she was absolutely certain it was a girl's name. Regarding it dubiously for a moment, she flipped her pencil over and blotted it out. Then she turned her attention back to the game.

Unique names were all well and good, but she wouldn't do something like that to her child.


	5. Chapter 5

"She's not just too good for you. She's too good for me." Juushiro said warmly as he shared lunch with Shunsui. His best friend and lover laughed as he opened his bento box. What cuteness would be in there today? Ah, sausages cut to resemble little octopi, hunkering down on the sushi and looking at Shunsui with googly little seaweed and rice eyes. How had she stuck those on? He wasn't sure but it was adorable.

"Oh, she is! This is more than we could ever have hoped for." Shunsui said seriously and Juushiro nodded. It was incredible, really. Neither of them had ever imagined a woman could be tolerant enough to accept their relationship.

Yet, that seemed to be exactly what Mai was capable of doing. Juushiro smiled a little as he looked at his bento box, hardly seeing the cute little fruit shapes his sisters had made. What they had now was a true blessing to them both. They no longer had to engage in risky trysts at his Division. Mai was willing to give them private time, going on 'girl's nights' with her friends or even just taking a walk. And with a wife and a child on the way, Shunsui's position with his clan had gone from tentative to firm. The elders were listening to him far more and there was even talk that his father would be officially removed as the clan head soon, with Shunsui replacing him. That would mean more work for his friend, of course, but it would also mean that his position would be completely secure.

Perhaps more importantly, there was a baby on the way. And there would eventually be more. Juushiro's eyes misted over a little at the thought. He loved children and his great regret in life was that he felt no attraction to women at all. If only he could have… but he couldn't, so he'd made his unit his surrogate family. Now, though, he had something better. Shunsui's child, a little boy or girl he could play with, give rides and spoil with treats… it was like a dream come true.

"Do you think it will be a boy or a girl?" He said although he knew that Shunsui could have no idea. His friend looked thoughtful for a moment.

"Well, Mai would prefer a girl. I'm afraid Rangiku is a terrible influence, she's enjoying shopping for clothing far too much." He said cheerfully and Juushiro smiled. Mai's closet was rather full, but the Kyoraku clan could afford it. "For me, though, I would rather have a boy." Juushiro lifted his eyebrows, silently inviting Shunsui to explain. He was more than willing to do that. "Girls are so difficult! I remember how I was as a boy and I would never want my daughter to meet someone like me~"

"Shunsui!" Juushiro couldn't help but laugh, his mind flashing back to their time at the Academy. Kami, how many women had Shunsui slept with? The list had been endless. "You have a point. But what if you have a son that turns out just like you?" He teased and Shunsui made a face. "Perhaps you'll get lucky and have a daughter just like Mai." He was sure she had been a wonderful child.

"Oh, Juu, I would worry even more for her then! Ah, well, we'll know in a few months." He said with a smile before eating one of his octopi. "Mm… I'm starting to look forward to it." Shunsui said and Juushiro was glad to hear it. Shunsui had never been interested in children the way he had. If he was gaining enthusiasm that was a very good thing. "And I know you are."

"Oh yes." He said and then blushed as Shunsui laughed. He knew he was going a bit overboard with his enthusiasm but he just couldn't help it. He'd wanted something like this for so long. "Sorry." He said and Shunsui grinned.

"Don't be! Ah, did you hear what Nanao-chan said to me yesterday…?" They moved on to other topics and Juushiro thought, for a moment, how perfect things were. They he blinked as he felt a moment of superstitious dread. Frowning at himself, he set that aside.

Just because things were perfect didn't mean that something was about to go wrong.

* * *

Mai looked blankly at the sheets of paper in front of her. Picking one up randomly, she began to read.

_Rustle of wings in darkness,  
Nothing is real but the reflections in one's eyes.  
Void of all meaning._

Mai ran her fingers over the paper before dropping it and selecting another.

_The color of rage is red but the color of destruction is blue.  
What is the color of loneliness?  
Is it brown or is it pink and green?_

"Why did I write this?" Mai whispered, trying to understand. It made no sense at all. Why would the color of destruction be blue? Pink and green? Picking up a pencil she wrote a question to herself. _What is happening to me?_

_I don't know._ Her hand wrote the answer without conscious thought and Mai's breath caught as she saw the different writing. That printing, so neat yet so unlike her flowing script. Swallowing, she wrote a reply.

_Who are you?_ Her hand shook and she felt a nebulous fear, then blinked as she felt almost irritated? Her hand moved, printing a reply.

_You know who I am._ Mai stared at the paper before writing a hesitant reply.

_You are me._ She suddenly felt certain of that. This was just… herself. _We are we._

_Our poetry is terrible._ The printing replied and she huffed a laugh. How very true. _Why is this happening? It is not right._ Mai frowned as she tapped the end of the pencil against her lips and thought about it. The printing was correct. This was very wrong, she could feel it in her soul. Licking her lips, she rested the pencil on the paper and wrote again.

_I don't know but I know when it started. That night I came back from the club, when I was wearing the white dress._ That had been the moment. _Something shifted in my mind. But why?_

_Perhaps you should not ask why. Instead, you should ask who._ The printing suggested and Mai stared at it for a moment before nodding slowly.

_Who did this to me?_ Because something was behind it. She felt so strange, so many disconnected thoughts and images pressing against her mind. Sitting down at the desk she allowed her mind to wander. Oddly enough, what came up was a thought of Shunsui and Juushiro together. Mai blushed lightly as she thought about joining them. But how could she do that? Would they even want her to? Mai blinked as an image suddenly flashed through her mind. A woman with golden hair and her breath came short as she had a vision of a lush body tangled with hers…

"I am not lesbian!" She almost yelled, shocked by that picture. Then she blinked as a male voice seemed to laugh in her mind. "I… no wait." Her body hadn't been the same. Had she been a _man?_ "This is so very wrong." She murmured before glancing at the paper. The message printed there was elegant in its' simplicity and took her breath away.

_I love you Tia._

Feeling a deep pain in her head, she quickly gathered up the papers and put them away. That was enough of this for today. In fact, maybe she shouldn't touch the papers again. But even as she thought that, Mai knew she would. Not writing wouldn't help, it would just bottle up these feelings and make her more prone to explode at odd moments. Rubbing her forehead, she went to prepare supper. Her hands shook a little at first but quickly steadied as she concentrated on the homely tasks.

Supper tonight was sushi. Mai smiled to herself as she used the bamboo roller to form it into elegant rolls. Her mother had said her sushi was so fine, she could be working in a restaurant. Perhaps if she had not been born a noble, she'd be a sushi apprentice right now. Although women were rather new to all that. Perhaps a pastry apprentice? That was considered more womanly. Not that she cared, but she'd heard there were barriers to women becoming sushi chefs. Shaking aside all that idle musing – she was a high noble, none of that would happen – she began setting out the food. Shunsui would be here any minute.

It actually took longer than expected for him to arrive and when he did, he seemed tired. Mai looked at him in concern as she set out the food.

"Shunsui? Is something wrong?" She asked as he looked into his tea, not touching the sushi. He looked up at her with a tired smile

"Just something rather odd going on in the Division. A rash of strange disappearances." He said and Mai blinked. "Two girls from my Division simply vanished. I searched for them everywhere and I couldn't find a thing." Ah, that would definitely bother him. "There was no hollow residue, nothing. If not for all the other disappearances I might think they'd left of their own free will." Mai felt a vaguely queasy sensation as she listened. Somehow, she couldn't help the feeling that this might be pertinent to her.

"What kind of disappearances? If you don't mind talking about it." She added, not wanting to press too much. Shunsui sighed and picked up a piece of sushi in his chopsticks.

"This is beautiful… two men from Zaraki's unit were the first to go. Best friends, apparently. We thought they were likely off on a drinking binge but then a man from the second vanished on a routine patrol followed by a man from Kuchiki's Division…" Shunsui went through the list and Mai frowned. The only Division that had been spared was Komamura taichou's, and that seemed like random chance. "There's a great deal of pressure on us to investigate. The only common thread in these disappearances is that every single one is a noble, between the ages of eighteen and twenty-five."

"…Oh." Mai felt another chill and was glad Shunsui was absorbed in his food now. He didn't seem to realize that she fit quite neatly into that age bracket. "There was a bit of a baby boom after the Winter War, wasn't there?" She asked, remembering one of her aunts mentioning it. She'd made a joke about the celebrations following a war. Shunsui looked up from his food with a smile as she picked up a piece.

"Yes indeed. Quite a large generation of young shinigami! It's been good for the Gotei 13, filling in the holes in the ranks." He seemed a bit melancholy and Mai nodded. There had definitely been some losses, over the course of the Winter War. "Mai, you're not eating." He said and she blinked before looking down at her full plate.

"Oh…" Blushing lightly, she picked up a piece of sushi and tried it. That reminded her that she was actually ravenously hungry and soon she was wolfing them down. He chuckled as he watched and she looked up, a touch surprised. He was smiling at her, a warm, loving expression.

"You should remember you're eating for two." He reminded her and she blushed. He was quite right. Running a hand over her belly, she could feel the gentle swell of her growing child.

"He's just a tiny thing, I don't think he's eating much." Mai said with a smile before picking up another piece of sushi. "Mmm… you're right though. I sometimes forget to eat when I'm feeling stressed." She knew that. Shunsui blinked at her, a touch surprised.

"Why are you stressed?" He asked and Mai groped for an answer. "More dreams?"

"I… something like that." Her mind went to her dreams. Abruptly, she tasted copper and had to swallow hard, almost dropping her sushi. "Blood."

"What?" Shunsui was looking at her strangely now and Mai had to breathe slowly for a moment, controlling her nausea.

"I… in my dreams, I was drowning but there was no water. It was blood." She said weakly. "I was drowning on blood." Her own blood, rising in her throat. Kami, no wonder those dreams had always been so terrifying. Arms suddenly went around her and she relaxed into her husband's arms, feeling comforted and safe.

"Kami." His hand went through her hair, lending her comfort as she pressed her face against him, smelling his warm, spicy scent. "That sounds like a lung wound… did something like that happen to you as a child?" Shunsui was trying to find a reason for her dream. Mai was sure it was nothing that simple.

"I don't know. Maybe, when I was a baby." She lied. If she'd suffered something like that, her mother and aunts would have told her all about it. The story of the time she'd fallen off a banister and needed stitches in her head had been retold many times. "It's nothing to worry about." Another lie. Mai was certain it was absolutely something to worry about… yet somehow, she didn't want to tell Shunsui. It was something she would worry about herself.

"Are you sure?" He tilted her head back, looking in her face. Mai was struck by the genuine concern there and blinked as she felt her eyes prickle. She was so emotional lately. "I just want to help you, Mai." He said and she smiled up at him, touched by that.

"You help me just by being here." She told him, feeling the truth of it in her heart. She loved him so much and when he held her, she was not alone. "It's fine. Don't worry, Shunsui." She said and hoped she was telling him the truth. She wasn't sure though. In fact, Mai suspected that was another lie and nothing was going to be fine but she just couldn't share it. If only she knew why… he smiled at her and she noticed those little wrinkles by his eyes again. Perhaps it was silly but she loved that little thing about him.

"Well, just let me know if you need any help." He said before gently kissing her. Mai melted into the attention, loving every moment of it. Would they do more tonight? She rather hoped they would. That would be wonderful. Although even as she thought that, an image of the golden haired woman flashed through her mind and she blinked. Her face. She couldn't see that woman's face. She was wearing a mask? Shaking the thought away she felt Shunsui's arms release her and smiled up at him before going back to her food.

Perhaps tonight wasn't a good night for sex. There would always be tomorrow.

* * *

Mai went through the market, feeling almost dazed as she picked out all the ingredients she needed. She knew precisely what she was doing and had left the house just as soon as she could to begin preparations.

"Stewing beef, pork tenderloin… chicken thighs… goat? No… kidneys? No, he doesn't like those…" Mai murmured as she looked through the meats. "Fish? No, it doesn't freeze that well." She needed things that would freeze well and could easily be reheated later, in the form of a pre-prepared dish.

After everything was selected and she had two large bags in hand, she went home in a burst of shunpo. As soon as she was there, she began putting pots on the stove. Pressure cooker here, rice on the go here, vegetables would be steaming here… she knew this routine. She had practiced it, for when she would be getting married.

_But why am I doing this?_ Mai wondered as she began measuring out all the components. _Where am I going?_ Because this was what a woman did when she needed to leave her husband for a while and wanted to make sure he didn't burn down the kitchen in her absence…

"Why is it that my lessons seem to assume that men are wise and leaders yet at the same time, blithering idiots?" Mai said aloud as she worked. Then she answered herself. "Because men are trained to make the decisions but put them in the kitchen and they will often turn into blithering idiots." Not that Shunsui would but Mai didn't want him to be living on nothing but his own cooking. She chuckled to herself and could almost hear a male tone. So oddly familiar…

It took many hours of cooking but finally she was neatly packing away the results. Each container was labelled with what it contained. Beef stew with rice. Pork with rice and steamed vegetables. Chicken thighs on a bed of rice and peas. Even a sweet little cherry pie. Mai sniffed a little as she put that into the freezer. She didn't want to go. She really didn't, but she had to…

Finally, she wrote a note for him and gently set it on the kitchen table.

_Shunsui,_

_I'm afraid I have to leave for a while. I'm not sure where I'm going or why I have to go and I don't really want to, but I just have to. I'm sure that will worry you. I know it worries me. But I'll be back as soon as I can, I promise._

_Please take care of Ito while I'm gone. Feed him and make sure he gets his chin scratched. There's food in the freezer, just heat it on the stove. No eating nothing but takeout! Juushiro will tell me if you do._

_I love you Shunsui. Please, be safe._

_Mai_

Then she walked out the door. She didn't look back.


	6. Chapter 6

"Damn." Shunsui breathed as members of the Sixth Division checked over his house, trying to find any sign that Mai had been kidnapped. He didn't think they would find anything. "Why didn't I think?" Now he was cursing himself. Mai was a noble and exactly the same age as the other disappearances. He just hadn't thought about it because she wasn't a shinigami, but her reiatsu was definitely powerful enough for her to be one. Why hadn't he realized that something was wrong?

"Shunsui, what's happening?" Juushiro just arrived, a touch out of breath. Shunsui looked at him miserably.

"Mai's gone." He felt hollow with dread. Although in a way, this could be a break for the investigation. Mai was the only one to leave behind a note. But then, she was also the only one who was married. There had been one pair of lovers, but they had disappeared together. "She left voluntarily, mostly." The letter made that clear… but it was also clear that something was affecting her. Juushiro looked confused.

"Mostly?" Shunsui sighed and began explaining the letter. Then Kuchiki taichou came out of the house.

"Kyoraku taichou. We've checked for any foreign reiatsu and found nothing." Byakuya reported and Shunsui nodded. "However, we have found something of interest. A collection of writings. We were hoping you might be able to help us interpret it?" Of course, Mai's poetry. Could that give them a valuable clue?

"Of course." He answered immediately and Juushiro tagged along as they went inside. Papers were spread over Mai's desk and he picked up one at random. He'd read a few things of Mai's, but only the ones she'd offered to him. Mostly, she didn't share them. Shunsui wondered now if he should have asked about it… but he'd thought she just didn't want to share bad poetry. Looking at the page, he began to read.

_When I was little, my favorite color was pink.  
Just like any little girl._

_When I was older, it was purple.  
More mature but still beautiful._

_Now, though, I feel like it should be green.  
And I don't like white.  
Why don't I like white? I always liked it before._

Shunsui blinked before scratching his cheek with a frown. That was odd. As he went through the papers further, he found another oddity.

"This isn't Mai's writing." Shunsui stared at the neat printing. And the poem itself… he swallowed as he read it.

_/It's so dark/  
/I can't move/  
/I can't breathe/  
/Copper on my tongue/  
/Drowning/  
/Hurts/  
/I am not alone/  
/I am not alone/  
/I…/  
/Wait/  
/No/  
/Tia?/  
/I/  
/Am/  
/Alone?/_

"Tia?" He murmured. Why did that seem familiar? Was that a name? It had a very strange sound. Frowning, he set the paper back down before selecting another. This time, it seemed like Mai was talking to herself, but all her responses were in that neat printing.

_I think I'll make sushi tonight, with green tea and gyoza dumplings._

_I don't like green tea._

_What do you mean? I like green tea and you said we are we._

_I still don't like it. It's bitter and unpleasant and he made us drink it._

_Who made us drink it?_

…

_Well be that way then!_

Shunsui scratched his head. If he hadn't known about the other disappearances he'd have thought his lovely wife was losing her mind. Then he picked up another page and smiled a bit as he read it.

_I loved the time we sat together, after his work was done.  
The light of the sunset touched his hair, making it look almost red, like it was glowing.  
He put an arm around me and I cuddled into his warmth.  
It made me feel safe._

_I can't wait until he gets home so we can –_

"Oh." Shunsui put the paper down, his ears heating. He understood why Mai didn't share most of these with him, now. They were more a diary than poetry. Then something caught his eye and he freed another page before staring at it. The writing was all over the place, not neat lines, and the words themselves chilled his heart. They were written in three different ways… neat printing, Mai's handwriting and a third version, a childish scrawl.

_Lilynette, where are you?_

_Tia, I miss you._

_Onna… I can't remember your name. Do you remember mine?_

_What is happening to me?_

_Taichou-san?_

_Liar! You promised us! LIAR!_

_Why am I so alone?_

"Lilynette." That was a name he did remember. "Juu, look at this – Juu?" He was staring at the paper in his hand and Shunsui saw he was blushing? "Juu!" His best friend and lover blinked, snapping out of it. "Stop reading her sexual fantasies and look at this." He chided and Juushiro blushed even more, mumbling a negative as he took the paper. Then he blinked at it, his eyes moving as he read the words.

"What is this?" He murmured. "Lilynette…" Shunsui saw a flash of guilt on his best friend's face. He knew if there was one thing Ukitake deeply regretted about the winter war, it was the death of that arrancar child. There had been no way to avoid it, though. She had been part of the Primera, Coyote Starrk. "Tia… wasn't that the arrancar Toshiro fought?" Juushiro said and Shunsui blinked.

"Ah, was it?" He honestly couldn't recall. "But they died before Mai was even born." All of the disappearances had been youngsters, born after the Winter War. "We need to take this to Kuchiki."

"Yes. But first, let's weed out all the ones that have nothing to do with the investigation." Juushiro said firmly and they began sorting through the papers, more intently this time.

They might hold valuable clues. They needed to find anything that was here.

* * *

Mai had no idea where she was going.

However, she did know that was wasn't going to a party or a nightclub. In fact, she might be going somewhere dirty or dangerous. In keeping with that, she'd dug out the practical part of her wardrobe. Instead of a dress or kimono, she was wearing trousers and a shirt. The pants were stout fabric, beige in color and her shirt was dark brown and long sleeved. The kind of clothing she might use for a hike in the woods, or gardening on a not so nice day. Vividly, Mai could remember a long ago lesson from her mother. A true lady always picked the appropriate clothing for the occasion…

Shaking away the errant thought, she continued on her journey. She was deep in the Rukongai, now. Hesitating, she stopped for a moment. Then she felt a pull in a particular direction. Following that guidance, she went to a great, broken aqueduct. Jumping down lightly, she went into the huge tunnel carved into the earth. It was wet and dirty and she was glad of her boots. Just like the rest of her clothing, they were sturdy and practical.

Mai felt no fear as she walked through the darkness. Lifting a hand, she used a modified version of a Red Flame Cannon to light her path. The reddish light made everything a bit surreal but it hardly mattered. Ahead, there was a metal door set into a wall. Pausing, she touched the door. Somehow, she knew what to do and it opened under her hands. The light from inside almost blinded her for a moment but then, she stepped inside. As she did she doused the kido and looked around.

Mai strongly suspected this place had begun life as a smuggler's den. However, someone had put in lighting and cleaned the place up. Mai gazed around curiously then blinked as a young woman pried herself from the wall and glanced her over. She returned the favor, seeing she was wearing pure white, with black lines. It didn't seem too practical for such a grubby place.

"Oi, another one?" She said in a bored tone and Mai blinked, noticing her eyes were dark brown and her hair was jet black. She was really quite pretty, aside from the attitude. "Don't remember much? Well, Szayel will fix that." _Szayel?_ That name was so familiar. Mai backed away, feeling a sudden fear. "Don't worry, Ulquiorra has him under control." _Ulquiorra?_ Her breath came short as she remembered the one poem she'd written, about wings in the night and emptiness. It had to do with that name, she suddenly knew it. "Oi?" She took a step back –

And yelped and jumped forward as she impacted something warm. Whirling around, she realized a man had walked in behind her. He looked just as startled as she felt and she met green eyes.

"…Tia?" The name came out of her mouth without prompting. Surprise abruptly congealed into shock as the man stiffened. Mai suddenly realized she knew him, and not as _Tia_ (what kind of a name was that for man?) but as… Shihoin. What was his first name again? She'd met him at the ball but it had been so long…

"Starrk?" That name took her breath away, but not as much as when he hugged her. It felt so wrong – he wasn't her husband – but also so very right. "Why are you a woman?" His voice sounded puzzled and Mai blinked.

"I was born this way?" She said, even as memories seemed to bubble up. The woman with golden hair and the face she couldn't see was this man? But how? Although the hair and eyes were close to the same. He laughed, gently letting her go but holding onto her shoulders.

"You are beautiful." His voice was warm and she blushed, looking down. "Wait, don't I know you? Kuchiki Mai?" He suddenly said and she blinked, looking up.

"Kyoraku Mai." She said after a moment and a startled look passed over his face. Then he let go of her shoulders.

"Ah, I forgot. You are married." He sounded very troubled and Mai bit her lip. She almost understood why this would bother him so much and knew it was connected to the golden haired woman and _Starrk._ But it was all so hazy in her mind. She –

"OI!" They both flinched at the irate tone behind them. "If she's the Coyote she has to go to Szayel RIGHT NOW! They've been looking for him!"

"Ah, yes, that's right." He said slowly but a coldness crept into those grass green eyes. As though the girl had reminded him of something unpleasant. He smiled at her but it seemed insincere to Mai's eyes. "This way." He said and she bit her lip before deciding there was no point in trying to refuse. She had come here of her free will, after all. Or had she? Something had called her here…

The Shihoin man stayed behind her, though, and Mai obediently followed the dark haired woman. She was young, she realized, perhaps a few years younger than her. And the yellow haired man was a year or two older. They'd met at the ball but what was his first name? They'd been introduced and danced but she just couldn't remember.

"I'm sorry. I don't remember your name." She said over her shoulder and there was a hesitation behind her.

"Koji. I am Shihoin Koji." Ah, yes, that was it. She remembered a bit better now. He was the youngest child of the Shihoin clan head, a younger sibling to the well-known Shihoin Yoruichi. Mai remembered her aunts gossiping about it a little. Apparently, the lady of the Shihoin clan's pregnancy had surprised everyone. They'd been certain she was past such things.

The room she was brought into made Mai consider trying to get past Koji and make a break for it. There were strange beakers and odd equipment everywhere. And the man – if you could call him that – in the room made a shiver go down her spine. His hair was bright pink and he turned as soon as they came in.

"Ah, who is this?" Golden eyes fell on her and Mai took a step back, bumping into a warm chest. "Oh what a powerful reiatsu! Have you finally found Coyote Starrk?"

"Yes." Koji said before resting a hand on her shoulder. Despite the situation, Mai found that comforting. "She needs to be awakened."

"Oh wonderful!" The pink haired stranger sounded almost giddy. Mai felt that she should know him. There was a name on the tip of her tongue but it wouldn't quite come. "Right over here!"

"I… don't know…" She glanced at Koji, who smiled at her reassuringly. Yet, there was still that strange coldness in his eyes. Somehow, though, Mai didn't think it was directed at her. She had a distinct feeling he was angry about something else.

"It doesn't hurt and then you'll understand." That did sound sincere and she hesitated before nodding.

The pink man – _Szayel?_ – had her stand in a strange machine. Mai endured it stoically. Although the feeling when it activated was beyond strange. It was like a door opening in her mind and Mai breathed deeply as all the memories poured back in. Her exile in the desert… Lilynette by her side… Los Noches… Aizen…

_I was dying in the ruins, buried beneath a shattered building. Did no one know I was there?_ Mai wondered about that. Shunsui, had he not known that Coyote Starrk was alive and suffering? Surely he would not be so cruel. _Aizen stabbed Tia in the back. I felt her die._ That had ripped Starrk's heart in two, even as he lay on the verge of death. Mai tasted his anguish, his desolation. Even as she experienced the past, though, her mind worked.

Ulquiorra hadn't died and he was here. It followed that he intended to free Aizen and this _awakening_ was how he meant to accomplish it. How had they all been reborn so, as shinigami? Was it something about what the Hogyoku had done to them, something about being arrancar? Mai was sure it was but that hardly mattered. What mattered was the fact that she would _never_ be able to convince Ulquiorra that Aizen was unworthy of their help. No wonder Koji seemed so angry beneath his false surface of calm. Although likely only she had spotted the anger. She was perceptive and knew Tia so well…

"Ah, excellent! How do you feel?" Mai blinked and turned her attention outwards. Szayel… what was his stake in this? Was he really so loyal to Aizen? It was possible.

"I feel fine." She said with a slight smile. "I am Coyote Starrk." It was a lie, really, but what he wanted to hear. Szayel seemed pleased with her response.

"Excellent! Ulquiorra is out looking for more recruits at the moment, but you should meet the others. Also, you seem to be lacking a sword? We'll have to try to find you one." That was true, she had no weapon, unlike the others. Mai was sure they were all shinigami. Glancing at Koji, Mai resolved to corner him later. He couldn't know that Starrk had been alive and felt Halibel's death. She would have to be careful though. Ulquiorra had excellent hearing and would kill them both in a heartbeat if he knew their true feelings.

They led her out to meet the others. That quickly turned obnoxious.

"Hoi, it's nice tits!" Oh dear. Mai cast her gaze to the ceiling for a moment before schooling herself to patience. She knew who the tall man was, now. And his blue eyed companion. There would be many terrible jokes. "See? We told you she was worth checking out!" He grinned at her and Mai noticed that Nnoitra was actually better looking as a shinigami. "These dumbasses were like, oh, no, everyone worthwhile must be a shinigami. I told 'em that a noble broodmare would – OW!" She'd been about to hurt him but it was unnecessary.

"Show respect, you fool. She is Coyote Starrk." Koji said harshly as Nnoitra – what was his shinigami name? – rubbed his head with a scowl. Of course, then his friend got into the game.

"Really?" The blue eyed man was suddenly invading her space and trying to look down her shirt. Mai was glad she'd picked out such a practical wardrobe. He wasn't seeing much. "You are WAY prettier than he was. Hey, I'm Shiba Ryuu, what's your name?" Oh. Well, that was nice.

"Kyoraku Mai. And I'm still married." She said politely and couldn't help but smile at his blatant disappointment. Then she looked at the tall man. "What's your shinigami name?" He blinked at her for a moment.

"Oh. Uh, Shiba Mantaro." He said and Mai blinked. "We're half-brothers. It's a long story."

"Heh, yeah! Our dad is Shiba Ganju. He had a threesome with these two sisters…" Ryuu – Grimmjow? – started with a grin. Then he fell silent as a cold reiatsu swept over them. Mai winced and edged towards Koji, who put an arm around her. Vaguely, she thought it was wrong that she was seeking out another man's comfort. But Shunsui wasn't here and she wanted to feel protected, even if it was futile.

"So." Ulquiorra was standing there, looking at her with emotionless green eyes. He hadn't changed a bit and Mai remembered that one poem she'd written, about wings in the night and reflections in his eyes. That had been for Ulquiorra and she hadn't known it at the time. "Starrk. Do you know what we are doing here?"

"We're going to free Aizen." She said it more bravely than she felt. Although… "How did you find out about this?" About all of them, their… reincarnations. How had they known? Ulquiorra blinked at her slowly.

"Szayel had a theory that this would occur." He said and Mai almost goggled. He'd foreseen this?! "You can ask him about it. For now, I will test your skill."

"Uh…" Oh dear. Mai swallowed hard but summoned her memories of _Starrk_ like a shield. Aizen's training of the Primera had been intense. Although, should she tell them she was good with kido? Mai quickly decided not to as she trailed after Ulquiorra. And should she tell them about her pregnancy? She was starting to show, just a little. Surely Szayel would notice it when he did a physical. Oh kami, her head was starting to hurt.

Mai didn't know exactly what she was going to do yet to stymie their plans. But she knew she was NOT going to betray Shunsui and she was NOT going to free that betraying bastard.

She'd just have to figure out how.


End file.
